Ho Hum

I love Ewan McG. Even though he can't do an american accent, he is still so sexy to me. In fact it kind of makes him cuter. Maybe I watched too many Long Way Down episodes. Maybe I'm always getting him confused with Peter Saaaaaaarsgard and Jude Law. Who knows. But he was damn sexy in Moulin Rouge. And a bunch of other things. I bet his kids are super cute.

There is a new library opening up in a month! I can't wait to walk through it. I wonder if the books will be new in a new library, or if there will be used books from other libraries in the LAPL system. I'm sure it'll be a mixture of both...though I'm secretly hoping the books will be on the newer side. Sure old books and used books give libraries their flavor. But man, are they dirty. Or, I assume they are. I don't want to find out by conducting my own black light research. I've taken to wiping down all my library books when I get them home with some clorox wipes. I don't want any type of dirt or germs sitting in bed with me when I read myself to sleep. But even with the wiping down they still feel dirty...maybe I just need to do a double wipe.

I know this all sounds very bougie, and very against romantic library ideals. But i can't help it, i don't like dirty.

I also hope this new library will have a good and large selection. The ones by my place are a bit scant. And I don't want to haul my ass down to the main downtown library to find what I want. Though, i probably should go again soon.

And, as if you weren't already sick of everyone else saying it today: What's with the winds?? Our power went out 3 times at work, and I gave up trying to restart my computer after the 3rd time. Let's just hope autosave is my friend in the morning. Hopefully this windy episode will alert my landlord to cut down the trees in front of my window soon. Crossing fingers...

Oh my f**ing....

This day has long been coming. I can't believe i even did it, usually i would have chickened out. But i gathered up all my courage tonight to knock on my neighbor's door.

She is so loud in the mornings! She does these workouts (kathy smith i believe, cuz i can hear it) and i can hear all this rhythmic thumping through my closed bedroom door!! So that starts at 5:45am, (8am on saturdays) for about an hour, and then she gives me some quiet while i just lie awake in my bed, unable to go back to sleep. And then! And then just when i finally fall back to sleep again, it continues at 8am where she runs in circles in her apartment, yes, INSIDE her apartment with what sounds like flip flops, so that every morning i hear this constant flapping noise through the walls. She'll do a few laps in her apt before going out into the halls, up the CONCRETE stairs, across the upstairs halls, and back in before SLAMMING her door to go to work. Every morning. Flip flops. Flap flap flap flap flap x every morning x 30min= a very annoyed me. And her loud tv too. Ugh, so annoying.

So finally i had enough this morning. Actually, saturday morning. I got dressed to go talk to her, but then figured she probably wouldn't want to be seen all sweaty and whatnot. I've ran into her in the hallways before when she's throwing out her trash and she has all this stuff all over her face. Fair enough. No woman wants to be seen a mess. So i tried to go back to sleep. But this morning...oh it was just pissing me off. To the point that i vowed to talk to her tonight after work. When she was dressed and not sweaty and presentable. So i did. Or tried.

First i paced around my apartment. Then finally i made myself go over, during what was the 2nd commercial of a commercial break of whatever show she was watching (because, yes, i can hear her commercials through my walls) so that I'm not interrupting her show. I knocked two times on her door, waiting for a long time in between knocks. I can hear through her LOUD tv what sounded like her getting dressed? So ok, i give her some time. But after a while it was obvious she was not going to answer the door, and i felt like an idiot standing in front of her door. So i wrote a note. Tried to word it so that it didn't sound rude (which was what i was trying to avoid by talking to her face to face). Knocked again, waited again, and taped the note to her door.

And now i'm blogging because i have all this nervous energy from talking myself into this ordeal. But this girl runs EVERYWHERE!

She runs to her door when she comes home from work. She runs a few laps in the apt after running to the door when she comes home from work. She runs down to the laundry room. She runs laps in the laundry room. She runs the perimeter of the garage instead of the straight shot to the laundry room. She runs to the garbage shoot. She runs EVERYWHERE! I applaud her for wanting to stay in shape, but not at the cost of my sanity! Plus running in flip flops can't be good for her feet! Why not just put some running shoes on? At least those won't be so loud.

So, i just heard her throw her trash out, and take the note off her door. I kid you not, i can hear these things. Thin walls, loud movements. Let's see if she leaves me alone in the morning.

Need some opinions. Am I asking too much in wanting peace and quiet? Or is she just crazy!! I wonder if she heard me knocking and saw me at the door with the peephole and decided to ignore me. What if i needed medical aid? A cup of sugar? I'm always friendly when i see her. I always say hi. This is the first time since she's moved in that i've tried to say anything. Why did she ignore me???? What do i do next time i run into her? Be friendly of course, but ask about the note? Pretend it never happened?

Oh yea, also i signed it as "your neighbor" instead of my name, cuz i figured maybe i can keep it vague enough for her to think its her OTHER next door neighbor, to keep her guessing and keep it down. But now when i run into her it'll be awkward....oh what an awkward situation....


NEED YOUR THOUGHTS PLEASE!

Today

Today, I woke up and could barely walk from my bed. Rewind: Monday I decided to do a Jillian Michaels workout video, and felt great afterwards. Yesterday I felt fine. Today though. TODAY. Sometime during the night my muscles decided to flip out on me and go bezerk and make me look like I have a stick stuck up my ass when I'm walking. It's the calves and the quads....oh...they burn.

This always happens to me. I exercise once; one video, one mile, one hip hop class, one climb. And then I'm hurting for the rest of the week. I know i probably need to work up to these sudden intensities, but I can't tell how intense I'm going until it's too late and I'm hurting a few days later. And then this throws my schedule off, and I'm out the whole week. I wish I could ask Jillian how to do this correctly and not hurt and keep going several times a week. I just want to be strong. I want arms that can punch you in the face if I have to. I want my legs to be calm and quiet after a day of sitting in a chair rather than buzzing and itching for me to take them out on a run. I want to be able to kick you in the nuts and run 5 miles away when you surprise attack me from behind. Suggestions on a good way to get into an exercise routine anyone? (And yes I warmed up.)

This pain won't fare well for Salsa class tomorrow. I may have to skip. The best thing last week was that the female instructor didn't remember me (likely), but the male one did! (surprising) We had a nice little chat while he whirled me around, like we were having coffee and scones to pass the time, instead of busting a move and working up a sweat. Because I am THAT good when I salsa with him. Sigh, too bad I might miss out tomorrow. I even practiced my hand moves, of the Sexy Hand Moves.

Not like the footsteps themselves aren't hard enough, but then they throw in these flourishes for the female arms. If you didn't know already, I have awkward arms. That's why I love pockets, they're practically a must have when I make a dress purchase. They just give that awkwardness a place to be, a home. But I digress...

Not only are these hand moves hard for me to refine, they have an element of sexiness to them that my awkward arms can't quite achieve. It's like when I tried hip hop and realized that my hips "just don't move that way." (Yknow, that "ahhhz...push it...push it good" kind of way. You know.) Arm-in-arm-out-past-shoulder-point-finger-slide-down. Too many things to think about to be sexy and slinky come hither arms. But...I'm working on it. It's just too embarrasing to work on in class, so I have to do it at home by myself, but then practicing isn't really practicing when you don't have a real partner getting in your way. Fiddle dee dee.

Today I had a great hair day. It was awesome.

Today I came home late from a long day at work, and still made myself dinner rather than just ordering take out. Yay me.

Today after pressing very few buttons to make an awesome edit, I realized that I am a sharp shooter. Fast too.

Today wasn't the greatest day that I've ever known, but it was way better than yesterday, so i'm grateful for that.

Come fly with me...

...or Falcon, either one.

Another day, another night of blogging from bed. I should really quit this bad habit.

Today I felt humiliated not once, but twice by technology. I really love you technology but the way we rely on you for the useless things in our lives just makes me feel really sad about the human race...and myself, for going along with the human race. Specifically, fb. There, I admitted it. I can't even spell it out by name. You know what I'm talking about, S. I'm going to hang my head in shame now, for even letting it get to me.

On the bright side of things...I'm getting my own show...on the web. I know you're thinking, who doesn't have their own show on the web these days? But since I work in tv, I'm hoping my show will stand out just a little more. At least I'm hoping. For now it's started out as a joke (actually has to do with my recent blog entry about the scary movie) but I'm hoping I can draw out this joke and make something out of it.
Actually I've always been quite serious about it but when I talk about it people end up finding it funny. And yes the haha kind of funny (no pun intended), instead of taking it seriously. Even though this will deviate from what i originally envisioned the show to be (since 7th grade), I really hope that it goes somewhere, does something, has a following. It's just up to me to figure it out what and how. But also I wouldn't be surprised if it doesn't go anywhere and was merely a one time joke. I guess we'll see.

I miss the rain...it was like an old friend, popping in to say a quick hello. I was hoping it would have stayed the weekend. We could've had tea together...

A coworker has decided to take the next 2 months to travel, and boss man approved it. Which means he'll be coming back to a job, safe and secure. I AM SO JEALOUS. And yea sure, since he's doing it, I could probably request the same thing, it's like he opened the gates for all of us, but still...I can't and won't. His reasoning was that nothing was keeping him here; he recently broke up with the gf, he still doesn't have a ton of friends here, and now, work is allowing him to come back. He feels like he's still young, gotta go see the world before he has to settle down. I agree with him completely. But as much as I'd love to drop everything, it's just not my nature. I'm a terrible traveler: I get sick so easily (car, motion, viruses, food). Im a girlie girl in that I'd need my stuff with me. Also I'm not one to venture out on my own. As much as I want to believe that I'm an independent woman, traveling is not something I'd want to do alone. What good is seeing old ruins and eating fine foods if you can't share it with someone else? If i travelled alone, I'd probably spend the entire time blogging in my head to someone that didn't exist! I should have studied abroad back in college, but not like I could've afforded it back then! I'm just jealous that coworker is able to do something I'm too scared to do myself. But good for him, I'm happy for him, though it leaves us in a sucky situation at work.

Oh it's so great when you're ready to go to bed and the sheets are cold and there's the sound of rain outside!  Apparently everyone's been waiting for this rain for a while, people can't stop talking about it.  Yes, including me.

I saw An Education tonight which was really good.  Finally a movie that doesn't make me hang my head in shame!  It's got a cute girl obsessed with Paris and she wears cute outfits from the 50s.  My kind of flick!  Movies like this give me hope in doing what I do.

It also made me really miss British things.  I've never been an anglophile like an old coworker of mine who just wanted to move to London and marry an englishman while listening to Brit pop all the time.  I've always thought it was a bit ridiculous, to badmouth and give up your own culture because you were so mad about another.  

But tonight watching this movie made me miss British things that I got to experience for a short while.   Like the British accents of children and women that I always loved to hear, PG tips, the F word with gordan Ramsey, weird words we never use here, answering a question with a question, and antiques roadshow, the BBC version.  I hope I'm lucky enough to experience all this again in the future, but for now I'm just grateful I was even able to get a glimpse.  

There's been a few blasts from the pasts lately which make me wonder what people's true perceptions of me are after spending large quantities of time with me in one sitting.  I don't just mean a hang out here and there but I mean real quantities of time.  The kind where you find out what really makes a person tick or the deepest secrets you don't tell other people.  I always feel like I start off pretty strong but then lose steam somewhere along the way and become this boring person who has nothing interesting to give...

I have this fear of being too serious and boring.  It's not a fear really more like it's something that's followed me all my life.  And so I try extra hard to get rid of it only to find out that I can't because that's just the way I am.  And I guess the fear really just stems from feeling like I'll be stuck with this stigma for the rest of my life.  Hm...I'll try this another day, I don't know where this is going really.

I'm a SURVIVOR!

What?
I'm not gon' give up
What?
I'm not gon' stop
What?
I'm gon' work harder!!!


Yay!! I survived. I'm still alive, and had an ok 2nd night of sleep last night without TOO many nightmares. The first night I had major nightmares...where Brett was shoveling rats down his shirts and I could literally feel them crawling on my body in my sleep. Ugh. And also the movie just kept replaying and creeping into my thoughts during sleep. That is one sneaky movie. NEVER AGAIN.

Just got home from a night with a wonderful man, Mr. Mraz. He was lovely as usual, but I wasn't digging the new goatee. What I love about him is that aside from talent just poring out of his pores, he also has such a positive attitude and outlook on everything. He is all about saving the world, creating community, love, all that lovey dovey stuff. If i didn't love him so much I'd think he was faking it, but I don't think that kind of attitude is something you can fake for too long. There are moments when he is playing or singing so intensely that I have to look away from him...because it's unbearable. I just can't handle watching him when he gets all that intensity in him. It's just too beautiful to look at.

OMG. I'm starting to sound like Bella. Good lord. Moving on.

It's suppose to rain next week. I can't wait to try out my rubber boots! (Yes, to protect me from the long trek i have to make to work. You never know what kinds of puddles could be lurking about from here to...across....the...street...)

Ok, someone tell me who told Scarlett Johanssen she could sing. I mean, ALLOWED to sing. She is awful, and what is Pete doing anywhere near her? Just because she's pretty doesn't mean she should sing! Seriously. ScarJo, please, do us all a favor and just stick to what you do best: Marble Columns. I'll even allow porcelain fountains. This one or that one or this one or that one. BUT NOT SINGING. Thanks.

Must not...fall...asleep.......

So.  Night 2 of blogging from bed.  But tonight it's because I'm afraid of going to sleep.  The trouble with being single is that you go to bed alone- there's no boogieman protection.  I seriously need one tonight.

The trouble started earlier this week when an email at work went out about how good the movie "paranormal activities" was suppose to be.  And then Brett announced that he was going to a screening of it at the paramont lot.  I asked if I could come along since i havent been back on the lot in forever, and its always fun to catch a screening there, no matter how bad the movie is, and since this one was suppose to be good, i thought it would be fun.  But alas, he already had his +1.

Apparently it was my lucky (or maybe unlucky) day since Ellen bailed at the last minute and I ended up going with Brett.

We both knew it was a scary movie but we were both totally and utterly unprepared.  I don't know what we were thinking...

Actually I was thinking of a completely different movie.  Note to self for next time: watch actual trailer of scary movie before bugging someone to take you to a screening.  Actually no, new note: get your scary movie titles right!!!!

I thought we were going to watch some movie with milla jovovich that was suppose to be scary but would turn out to be laughably funny.  After an hour of the movie with no milla anywhere close in sight, I still thought to myself "wow, how are they going to introduce her this late in the game?". Uh...I am so stoopid.  

Towards the climax of the movie, yes the part where I was shitting in my pants and covering my eyes, I was thinking "wow this must be a weird new way of marketing films...to put milla in the trailer and not even use her?". Boy I am so stoopid.  

It wasn't until after the movie that I realized that I thought I was seeing a completely different movie.  Yes after Brett informed me, "uh...milla jovovich isn't in this movie.".    Oh.
  
Seriously people.  There is absolutely no need for people to see this movie.  Not to say it wasn't well done.  It was actually a really good scary movie.   (says the girl who is afraid to fall asleep).  Who likes scary movies anyways?  Unless you're the type of person that likes to torment themselves.

So now, I'm in bed, so very tired but afraid to sleep.  I've already watched my gossip girl DVDs, lived through blaire and chuck's little games for a few hours, caught the late night oprah (today it was about hoarders)...and I'm tired and want to sleep!!!

I wonder if brett's having any luck sleeping.  His gf isn't home for boogieman protection either so he said he was gonna go home and "watch the shit out of finding nemo."  I told him the only Disney movie I have at home was...Monsters Inc!!!!!   Agh.

So for now, I'm blogging and listening to Jason mraz.  Thinking of puppies and flowers and raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens.

Speaking of MR. AZ, Hills and I will be seeing his lovely face Saturday night, at the bowl!  I'm so excited, we've been waiting for this concert for a really long time.  I know most guys can't stand his music but he is really just oh so talented and just so much better LIVE than on his lame poppy over-produced sellout albums.  Ok sorry I didn't mean that.  It's just that I know he is so much better than his albums... But I guess if you want to go world wide, you have to suck it up sometimes and make albums that sell.  And when you're famous people will pay to see your live shows and see how good you really are...?  Man I'm glad I'm not in the music biz.
Though I don't know how much better my industry is...but that introspective career blog shall be saved for another day when I'm not typing with my thumbs.

What else...

Oh my bff and hubs bought a house today.  What an adult thing to do.  Nevermind the fact that they've been married and have two kids-but they're REALLY adults now.  Maybe not just the house but the whole adult package with marriage and kids.  It's like picture day and picking how many pictures you want.  

They chose package A: the marriage the kids the house and ten 8x11's.  For now I seem to have chosen package D: five wallets, no boogieman protection, and years away from being adult enough to order package A.  
But yknow, I think I can only handle 5 wallets for now anyway.  And guess what S?  You're getting all 5 of them to put on the walls of your new place!  One for each room.  Yay!  
Congrats to you both, I couldn't be happier for you guys.  (do I get a room there too??)

Ok kids.  Enough of this silliness.  It's time for bed.  (who am i kidding, its really because my batteries are dying).

Wish me luck, I hope I make it through the night.

I really don't want to make a habit of blogging from my phone but it's just a hand thing to do when you don't have a laptop nor a tv in your bedroom and the phone is just so within reach.

I've been listening to a lot of Savage Love podcasts in bed since I've been sick.  It's a lot like loveline but he takes more time.  Also I think some of the questions are a deeper level of xxx than loveline, if that makes any sense.
It's pretty interesting to listen to, though I don't always agree with what dan has to say.  He's very much against monogamy. And although some part of me agrees with his logic, the other part of me wants to believe he's wrong.  Well ok, he's not AGAINST it, he just doesn't believe that humans are meant to be monogamous.

I know that the world is just too big for me to have only ONE "the one", and if I do meet "the one" it would be one of a handful, with the rest of the handful spread out all over the world.  But what if I'm only really compatible with 100 people in the world?  100 is a rather large number, I don't think I even know that many people, but in the scope of things...100 is merely an ant in the hay stack of our world of 2.5 billion!  And what if 50 of them are just milling about in say, Detroit, all clustered up together as ants like to do.  That cuts my chances of meeting that ONE by half!  (Because really, I'll never go to Detroit, who goes there for fun?)

I don't know what point I'm trying to make.  I guess it's just that I feel like, unless I'm constantly travelling the world and meeting new people everyday, it's not very likely that I'll meet my one in 100 just sitting here idle.  Idle as in living in one area.  But people do it everyday.  Dozens of people are hooking up in the greater Los Angeles area every day!  (or so says the slutty chick on those late night commercials.). And by hooking up I mean having meaningful relationships, THE ONE relationships.  So it must be possible.  But doing the numbers make it seem so improbable...

The trouble with staying home from work...

1. You end up watching TV shows on DVDs non stop, getting sucked into the lives of characters that you'd never hang out with (though secretly wish you did). A couple years ago this happened with Sex and the City, where I started to believe I was Carrie (ok fine, I still do). This year I'm living the upper east side life via Blair and Serena. The only thing is that this time, I know I'm not either of them, but I'm starting to believe I'm living life in the nyc. XOXO

2. You end up bored and paranoid, scouring the internet for swine flu information, only to find that you have all the symptoms. Ah, good old internet. What did we do before the internet days when we couldn't self diagnose our illnesses?

3. You miss hang outs and parties because you can't spend too much time on things that don't involve laying or sitting down.

4. You end up making lame lists on your blog.

5. You listen to way too many hours of the Savage Love podcast, which, isn't exactly trouble, but might be when you realize you can't quit it.

6. You see too much coverage of the Letterman extortion scandal.

That's all for now.