Be all that you can be. -G.I. Joe

It's been an interesting past few days. My dear friends got married. I hung out with my sister and her baby. Oh, and my dress came in! (Got the pink, and though it fits, it's a bit too tight. I either need to lose some inches or give it to someone else. Not worth sending back to the UK.)

I was surprised at how social I was at the second wedding on Saturday. Maybe because I was on my own and had the freedom to do whatever I felt like. Or maybe because I actually knew some people there and was excited about catching up. Maybe the people were just friendly and my type of people so we all clicked. There were a couple times where I ended up sitting by myself at the table because the other people I had met were busy being social or going to the bathroom or something. But I felt totally ok with just sitting there by myself and just enjoying the moment. I'm not always ok, sometimes I feel like a big loser sitting by myself, other times I feel totally fine and empowered. This was one of those fine moments. Except someone will always come up to me and ask why I'm sitting by myself. As though it's such a horrible awful thing to sit by yourself. People need to learn that being alone is sometimes not such a bad thing.

I felt like I was pretty on fire with the social thing on saturday. I'm often not, and can be quite the Daria. And though I enjoy having my Daria moments, I think I'm a better person when I am being social (the genuine kind, not the fake obligatory kind) and making real connections with people, so I will strive to be that every time I'm in a social setting now. I won't always achieve it, and that will be ok, because sometimes I really do love being Daria (she got her own show didn't she?), but I'm going to try and make a bigger effort to be the best of myself at most times. Except Sundays. I rest on Sundays and go bad.

Speaking of Sundays...I didn't drive my car all day Sunday and came out on Monday very late morning to find a note on my car that read: Don't park in my driveway. I took a look and the butt of my car WAS indeed blocking part of my neighbor's driveway. I'm usually not so careless, but let's just say I came home a bit late Saturday night and did not notice my bad parking. I felt bad about it because it was like that for over a day, and if it had happened to me, I would've been VERY annoyed at whoever owned the car. Maybe even called to have it towed. I also felt like I had been reprimanded for drawing on the walls or something. So since then I made a vow to NOT park on that neighbor's curb. Because I knew that once my neighbor saw me with my car, and saw my asian-ness, he or she was going to blame it on that, rather than my one evening of carelessness.

So tonight as I was going to my car, I saw that neighbor out on his driveway, sweeping. At first I was just going to avoid him, avoid all eye contact, and just hop in the car and drive fast. But then we made eye contact and we waved to each other, friendly neighborly like. And by then I didn't feel like I could just ignore it, so I said, "sorry about my car the other day." And instead of going off on me about how bad of a car parker I was, the neighbor guy apologized back, and said he didn't realize it was my car. "It's just that there's very little room to move already and with the car...." I stopped him and said I understood completely and it was my fault entirely and that I was very sorry and it won't happen again. He was so nice about it, that it made me love my neighborhood even more. Neighborly issues happen all the time and we resolved it like the grown ups we are. And he said he "didn't realize it was my car" as though, if he had realized, he wouldn't have left the note. All in all, I was feeling uneasy about the situation for the past few days, and I'm glad things resolved the way they did.

Ugh, boring, who cares right?

I'm also trying to make myself go to bed earlier so I wake up earlier, but it's tough. It's tough when you don't want to go to bed and find all these things to do instead of going to bed.

But again. Who cares. Talk about snore and a half.

I can't handle all this 9/11 stuff.

I'm not complaining, it's all just so overwhelming. There's this constant lump in the back of my throat whenever I hear a story. It's all over the tv and radio, there's no getting away from it.

And I get that 9/10/11 is a cool date, but did my friends really have to pick the day before the 10th 9/11 anniversary to get married? Just seems like too much going on for one weekend. It'll be hard to be in celebratory mode when everyone else is in commemorating a really horrible event mode.

Yesterday while I ran errands, I finally noticed it. It was hard for me to read something far away! I had a hard time focusing, and everything just looked blurry. I thought, "What is going on?" and then realized what WAS going on and thought "Oh, so this is how it starts." And then a few minutes later, the optometrist called and said my glasses were ready. Seriously, I kid you not. Funny how the world works sometimes. I tried the glasses on a few times yesterday and did NOT like them. I think it made my eyes hurt. I felt like I was looking through a side view mirror that was held up to my nose, where everything is closer than it seems. It was weird.

Thursday

Went out with some friends tonight but called it an early night since I wasn't feeling well. Really body? Are we back to the sicknesses again? I need to start taking some vitamins I guess. But I hear they're just a waste of money, and they don't do anything. Hills is taking some b vitamins, maybe I'll try that. Need to get my immune system in tip top shape.

Speaking of tonight, it was freezing out tonight. Sure, it's September. But I was JUST getting used to this summer thing, I'm not ready for it to go away yet.

I spent most of today with an old colleague who I was a bit nervous about not having much to talk about with but we spent about 6 hours together today! And I didn't even get the chance to use her pool! Seems like I spend more time with people that I wouldn't otherwise while I'm unemployed, which is actually Pretty Cool.

Choir rehearsal was....well, it was pretty fun actually. VERY INTIMIDATING. Especially since I was sitting next to vonne without thinking about how seating is based on groups, just like in orchestra. Duh. So I was sitting in the soprano section, without knowing whether I was a soprano or alto or what. Most of it I was able to get through, but there were those high notes I couldn't hit. I think I may have to move sections, but I'd hate to leave vonne, especially since she's the soprano section leader!!

Going to bed now, to sleep off this...whatever it is. Maybe I'm just dehydrated from the day?

Which Color?

Help! Readers, I'm in love with this dress and it comes in so many colors that I can't decide! I have narrowed it down to the following colors, but there were so much more! I think I may go with the pink.


Poppy


Pink


Mustard



Sage


Coral


Champagne