I'm freeeeeeeeeee!

Ok. But not for long.

The world of fashion photography is quite an interesting one. I can't quite put it into words right now, but it was a fun experience.

I had no idea that dogs snore. I'll miss them puppies.

Working with a bunch of guys can be annoying and lonely at times, but other times, man, it just doesn't matter because you're surrounded by a bunch of cute guys! The kind where you have to ask them to repeat something because you clearly were just staring into their lovely face instead of paying attention. Clearly. And when theres more than one around, it can get kinda dizzying.

The end. For now.

so much to say...too tired to write..goodnite.

Tales of the Employed Unemployee, Episode 2

I feel like I've been out of contact with the world for a week, but in fact it's really only been two days. You spend 2 days in a house up in the hills, and already I feel as if I've been away on vacation...except not as fun as vacation...though perhaps just as interesting.

I'm currently working as a PA on a photo shoot with a really famous photographer, the details of which I probably can't get into until I'm done. (well, ok probably not, but it sounds cooler that way, no?) He has these three large great danes. And by large, I don't mean shaggy dog large, I mean LARGE. As in, they come up to my stomach. As in, if they were to stand on their hind legs, they might be as tall as me. As in, they can probably take me down if they wanted to without trying too hard. But they're so sweet. We're currently occupying a side room as an office, and according to their caregiver, its their "lounge." Geez, I don't even have a lounge. They'll just come in and stare at me, or my boss, as if they're saying, "Strange beast, what are you doing in my lounge? I'd like to lounge now, can you please get out or move?" And I just look at them straight in the eyes (its easy because the chair I sit in is so low that its at their eye level), pat them on the head, and just smile. Sometimes I bring out the baby talk...cause I'm sure that really annoys them. So since we strange beasts won't budge, and they want their lounge, they'll just plop down right next to us. Haha..suckers.

Beasts: 1.
Great Danes: 0.

And now, the sidelines:

Rumor has it that my Idol nemesis, ACE, is finally off the show. Thank god! This fact has yet to be verified, which I will do after this blog.

Ok, so how many of you want to see American Dreamz, raise your hands? Higher....higher...! YOU in the back, I can't see your hand! Yea, you all know you want to go see Mandy Moore. At least I do. :-( I thought I had grown out of Mandy Moore, and sometimes I really can't stand her sweeter than candy demeanor, yet I always want to see her movies. And buy her albums (the last one sucked big time by the way!!!). So, as dumb as this movie may look, I'm DYING to see it. Plus Hugh Grant is in it, it's got to be good! I love Hugh, I really do, love Hugh.

(Haha...I just thought of this really funny scene for a situational comedy where...well, this is how it would go:

Girl: I love Hugh.
Guy: Really?
Girl: Yes, really and truly.
Guy: Well...I don't know what to say...
Girl: Don't say anything, I just needed you to know...
Guy: I never thought I would say this to anyone but...I think I finally realize...I love you too!
Girl: Really?
Guy: Yes, really and truly.
Girl: Wow, I never knew.
Guy: Well, you're the first person I've ever said that to.
Girl: But I love Hugh.
Guy: Yes. And I love you too.
Girl: So what do we do now?

And yak yak yak, blah blah blah. The rest is where the hilarity will ensue...promise. Yea ok, needs some work...but boy, I can drag that on forever! Moving on.)

I missed out on the wondrous day that is 4/20. I didn't even realize it til 10pm. I have 12min left to celebrate. And when I say celebrate, I don't mean "celebrate" with equipment and all. I just mean, a little, "yay hooray, its 4/20 day" in my head. And I just did it. With 10 minutes to spare...whew.

Kelly Clarkson performing in Irvine in AUGUST!!!! OMG!! Do I dare go? She speaks to me, she really does. Well, through her music, not the mobile or anything like that. I have some time to decide.

WELP. I think that's all for now. I'm tired. I hope I don't die these next couple of days. If I do, someone finish my situational comedy for me, please. And make it good.

Good Night.

I always have this self conscious feeling of not knowing enough information about anything and everything. Sometimes I wish I was E.T. and can just absorb knowledge with a snap of a finger. And, I'm not even talking about the important stuff. I mean, important stuff like world news and politics is good to know, and I'd love to absorb that too. But I don't even know the unimportant stuff-like Sanford and Son? Ok, just googled it. Looks familiar, but never seen it. Jefferson Airplane? Is that 1 person or a group? Though I am a child of the 80s, I missed out on most of the decade, due to the fact that I was out of the country in my early years. I barely caught the New Kids on the Block craze, I didn't know who Tiffany was til freshman year of college, and I can't even name 1 Billy Idol song. Sure, these facts aren't that important, but people bond over things like this. And when it comes up, I feel like the non-smoker in the smokers' circle: so uncool.

So help me out readers. Give me some factoids. People to know, incidents that happened, songs to listen to. Pass the cigarette and light me up, I WANT IN!

PS!

May I introduce (ta da!) Ms. Sarah Parker's new/old Blog, as well as Mel and Jyvonne's Blog, over there, to your left!
Let's all welcome them to the Blog World! (applause)

Thank You.

Taxes: finally sent. Hooray!

This leaves me more time for:
*Taking over the world: Check.
*Blogging: check.
*Being unemployed: check.
*Hula Hooping: check.
*Eating: double check.

Knowing I won't have to do it all again for another year: Priceless.

:-)

Tales of the Employed Unemployee

Today, I realized how many people in LA don't work. I know everyone says that about LA, but actually seeing it still amazes me. What amazes me even more is that everyone looks like they're being paid not to work. Everyone just looks like they have so much time on their hands, not a care in the world, except for maybe whether or not they really got the nonfat milk they asked for in their lattes, or if indeed! it was replaced by whole milk and that no, the barrista was not paying attention after all.

Maybe they're not unemployed. Maybe its their day off. Maybe its their lunch break. Maybe they're on vacation. But all I can say is that these people who are not working between the hours of 9 to 6 for the most part, all look GOOD. The guys look good, the girls look good, even the babies and dogs look good. Boy, that's LA for you.

Today on my one-day-job, I went around LA gyms and fitness clubs trying to get people to audition for a print ad. Boy, people in LA sure work out ALOT. Not only do they work out, they work out at HUGE fitness centers that have valets dressed all in white to greet you when you get out of the car. Whatever happened to that diet tip where you're suppose to park as far away as possible so you can get a mini work-out from the walk? But I guess if you can afford it, you just pay to have someone do the mini work out for you BEFORE you actually work out yourself.

I also listened to bits and pieces of the same newscast on NPR oh about five times in my car. I can't stand the other radio stations now...whatever happened to all the good stuff?

I'm currently doped up on caffeine. Caffeine and sugar. I've had nothing in me all day except for coffee, and a piece of cake. Chocolate cake. Good cake. And now, my fingers want to type faster than my brain can process. It's really such a shame, to put all this energy to waste. If in an alternate world, the ability to type faster than fast is equal to that of a surgeon's skills here in this world, I'd be saving more lives than you can count right now. One two three four five. More lives than you can even read this sentence.

I must go. My friend the microwave is calling me. It plans to cure my faster than fast typing abilities by putting some sustenance in my body. You know, to counteract the drugs. I hope, in our world, that micro wave succeeds, though I can't say the same for those on the other world.

Until next time these fingers hit the keys, and save lives in the process (should we be on that OTHER world),
Ciao.

Dear friend,

I'm sorry you've been neglected lately. It's not you, please don't think it's you, you're wonderful. Thing is, it's me...or rather, myspace. No, you're not encroaching upon it, like I've said, it's not you, you're wonderful. Its myspace, and it's evil. I'm weak, and I'm easily tempted by others to spend more time in myspace than what is really necessary (which, in truth, is NOT AT ALL). I know you're always here for me, so I will make more of an effort to spend more time with you. Especially since our anniversary is coming up in a few months. No, I haven't forgotten. It'll be our 5th. See? I do love you after all! So please, forgive me, I've returned to you.

Sincerely,
SH

Wow.

Today has turned out to be quite the interesting day.

The End.

But also the beginning of a new chapter.

Man...I get so jealous when I find out about people going to grad school. It seems so big and important. Not to mention exciting. I loved school...well, college is more like it. I didn't really love learning until I got to college. Highschool was just a mandatory social experiment that I happened to survived through. Oy...

College was where I actually learned. And looking back on it now, I didn't want to leave. As much as I loved San Diego, I liked it as much as I did because of school. And because of the people at school. Not just for the social aspects, but well...there were so many smart and interesting people in college. And professors too. I remember having the BEST last quarter ever. I was stimulated and challenged. I was learning about things I was interested in. And some that weren't so interesting, but for the most part, it was. But for some reason I graduated a quarter earlier than everyone else, I guess hoping that I'd get a jump on the industry competition before everyone else in my major graduated. Not a lot of good that did. Yea. If I had known then what I know now, I would've stayed that extra quarter, taking classes that I didn't really need to but wanted to, and just enjoy the good hearty edumacation (not to mention the shuttle rides).

Maybe I should go back to school?

Goodbye Ace, Hello Chris!

Dear Ace,
It was either me or the hair, and it seems as though you've decided on your hair...so I'm moving on- with the baldy.

Regards,
SH

Dear Katherine,
You're beautiful. We're practically neighbors! Let's do lunch.

Best Wishes,
SH

Holy Cow.

I drove by a Baja Fresh yesterday and did a double take as my eyes skimmed over a sign that said: Now serving Breakfast Burritos. Now, Baja Fresh isn't exactly my favorite, I prefer Rubios, especially after those days in Hollywood where we would end up eating Baja once or twice a week, just because it was convenient. But now that they serve BBs there, I may have a different outlook on Baja. Then again, I really should try the BBs there before I jump to any conclusions.

So last night, as I stared at this sign, I realized something. You know how sometimes you wonder what you're doing here? You know, those big questions about life, and who you are, and what your purpose is, yadda yadda. Last night I realized that I am here to spread my love of Breakfast Burritos to the masses. (At least those who read my blog.) See, its all very simple. I try the Breakfast Burritos from all over, I tell people about them - which ones were great, which ones to stay away from, etc, and I pass that information on to YOU, the masses, so that you can share in the joy that is: The Breakfast Burrito. I'm not here to serve god, I'm here to serve YOU, at least the part of your taste buds that enjoy Breakfast Burritos.

Holy Breakfast Burritos Batman!

Try saying that 3 times fast.

No Ace, YOU give ME butterflies...

Man, every time I see that guy smile I can't help but smile to myself. It's contagious. He can stand to lose some of that hair, but, no matter. Yummy.

My American Idol fun fact of the week: One thing people may not know about me is that I can recite the entire greek alphabet, from Alpha to Zeta. If you're lucky, I'll recite it through song.

My American Idol performance for the week: Katie Melua's "I cried for you." I can't get enough of that song.

Randy will say: Yo yo, listen, listen, that one goes straight to the dog pound...woof woof.
Paula will say: It was a big risk because Katie's voice is so good, but you made it your own. I can't wait to see what you do next week.
Simon will say: I like you SH, I do, but that song just didn't do it for me. (And...cue boo hiss from the crowd)


And that is how I participate in my own American Idol.

Oooo woah woah.

Stop with the Brokeback jokes, PLEASE!

Yes, it was a good movie. Yes, there were some awesome performances. Yes, gay cowboys are kinda hot. Yes, it may have broke new ground.** Yes, we all wish we knew how to quit Heath Ledger...it's hard, I know. But please, for the sake of originality, and my sanity, PLEASE:

STOP WITH THE BROKEBACK JOKES!!!!

It's kinda like what George Clooney said about winning his oscar, that he'll be forever known as an oscar winner and sexiest man of 1997. That's how I feel homosexuality will be associated with from now on. Which is kinda sad to me. In the future, we'll look back in the post-Brokeback Era, and know that it started with this movie. Being gay will no longer simply be "being gay". (Not that it's that simple to begin with) Homosexuality (not to mention cowboys too!) will now always be tainted by that movie, with the prefix of "Brokeback ThisorThat" or jokes like "Hey there goes that Brokeback couple" or "maybe that cowboy is from Brokeback Mountain."

Ok ok, lame jokes I know, but I'm not a freakin comedian. I'm just trying to make a point.

So the point is, references to the movie are no longer funny. It has overstayed its welcome. I also believe this whole phenomenom is creating this outlet that's making it ok to poke fun at gays. First there's the Brokeback to the Future spoof, then theres the Top Gun spoof. Then there's Billy Crystal in the tent with Chris Rock. Not to mention the film montage during the Oscars that show supposedly all cowboys are gay in old westerns. Yadda yadda yadda. Ok, alright, I get it!!!! Now stop it!!!

I don't usually get irritated with too much, but this topic has me irked. I really do believe it's just the lack of originality. Spoof after spoof, joke after joke, it's always the same thing. If Brokeback the film was suppose to be a "fresh" new look at homosexuality, then boy, you spoofers and joke makers are really sucking it dry.

And the other reason is just what I said earlier, that spoofing this film is making it ok to make fun of being gay. I don't know, are there any gay people reading this that don't agree with me? Am I being too uptight about this? Making it an issue when it's really not? Do you, as a gay man or woman, actually enjoy these jokes? Not that I have any gay readers, but because I really don't know, why don't you tell me.

But for all of our sakes, I really hope this is just a phase that everyone grows out of...like that whole Jerry McGuire phase we all went through where everyone "completed" each other and all that bullshit.

**And can someone please explain to me how Brokeback broke new ground? We're in 2006. Homosexuality is everywhere, though perhaps not accepted everywhere (like your trusty Mastercard). We've seen homosexuality before in movies. It's on TV everywhere! The L Word, Queer as Folk. Samantha made lesbianism hot on Sex and the City (yes, most guys will argue that it was always hot to begin with, that Samantha had nothing to do with it, whatever, I'm trying to make a point). Will and Grace is on a public channel, not CABLE, where you have to pay! Any poor person with a TV has access to Will and Grace. I'm just trying to pointing out, it's nothing new!!! (Damn, I should be a lawyer.)

So, even though Brokeback was a great love story, does the fact that it's a love between two really really, I mean, really hot gay cowboys (let the record show that I've loved Heath even before he went down in A Knight's Tale back in '01 and my relationship with Jake began shortly thereafter) make it ground breaking even though it's a subject we've all heard of/seen before?

Can someone explain that please?


Oy. I rest my case.

Oh Kelly Clarkson, how I love you.

I need another day.

SB has a point. Sometimes, the two day weekend is just not enough to do all that you need to do. We have five days to work, why don't we get 5 days to do our shit? But see, I'm not even asking for 5, I'm just asking for one more. Three day weekends should not be something we look forward to, it should be the norm. The units of time within 2 days is sometimes just not enough for what I have planned. I have old roommates to catch up with. Phone calls to people I have to make. Movies to watch. Moon to play with so she doesn't feel unwanted. Trainers to set up. Laundry to do. Self training to master. Guitar songs to rehearse. Grey's Anatomy I want to watch. Apartment to be cleaned. And so on, and so forth. Every weekend, I make this list, and hardly ever do I check off the entire list before it's Monday morning again. After the hours spent into extra sleeping, showering and eating, the weekend's half gone. If we had another day, we wouldn't run into this problem. Everyone would be refreshed from the weekend, having done all that was needed, and be ready to work on Monday. Great, and now I'm starting to sound like SB.

Tonight, Moon and I made it home to watch the last hour of American Idol, guy's night. I try not to get sucked into these things, but its hard. Especially with someone like Ace on the show! Boy, he's a real winner, I'll tell you that. Moon would never admit it, but she was mesmerized too, I can tell.

I finally finished Life of Pi last night (which was the reason for me getting up late this morning and almost late for work). I had my doubts in the beginning, but halfway through it, I found myself engulfed in the book, and thinking about it throughout the day, wanting to talk to someone about Pi, (also wanting to eat some pie too, but that's nothing new). That's when you know you've got something special; when it creeps up on you before you even realize it.

There's just something about reading a really good book thats just so refreshing yet really lonely at the same time. The experience of it is twofold: you find yourself trapped inside the world of the writer, living his words, celebrating his joys, traveling the world. Yet at the same time, reading a book is so personal: you do it by yourself at your own pace, you turn the pages when you're ready, all the sadness and happiness you're experiencing is done alone. There's no one to share it with at *that* moment. There were so many times while I was reading when I just wanted to turn to the person next to me and say, "can you believe that just happend?" but I knew I would be answered by silence.

Oh sure, tons of people have read the book, I can find anyone to sit down and have a discussion, but I just feel it won't be the same. They'll be recalling hints of memories of what they read a week, a month, a year ago. They may remember what happened in chapter 24, but would they be able to remember how they felt when they read that chapter? What was racing through their minds? What kinds of questions they had that they deeply needed answered right then?

No, I don't believe it would be the same.

But, no matter. As lonely as it is, I would rather have these amazing experiences on my own than to never have read anything worthy of a deep heavy sign of appreciation as I did last night.



Mmm...french apple pie.

Alas, I've found that Mr. A-Z will not return to the states until at least after June. Hopefully he will be back in July, perhaps in time for my birthday? That would be spectacular.

This past week the band finally got together for the first time ever, after months of talk and mental rehearsals. Things escalated when our "studio" (if you will) was suddenly made available to us. Shortly thereafter, we conceived of the greatest band name ever, one that everyone quickly agreed to without hesitation (not to mention ideas for t-shirt designs), which finally resulted in our first jam session. One thing I realized during our jam session was this: being a rock star will be harder than I imagined. Not that I ever thought it was easy, but it will be hard. I need to brush up on my skills. (But in reality, I really need to just get some skills.) My lack of musical abilities was not exposed this time, for Hillz forgot to bring her amp for me, so I played as if I was the greatest rock star ever, and since they couldn't hear me, nobody was none the wiser. But since then, the amp has been brought in, and the next time we play, everyone will find out I'm a fraud.

But no matter. I will not let that stop me. Embarrasment only lasts momentarily (unless you're like me, and tend to play all things embarrassing on a constant loop inside my head.) And if I suck now, I can only get better. I'll bring home the "most improved" award. Afterall, I can't NOT be a part of a band with a name so great. It'd be like knowing you have the winning lottery ticket, and then throwing it in the trash.

And who would do that?

"Not I", said the fly with a pie in the sky.

Not I.

The Chronic (WHAT!)-cles of India

,

and subsequently Hong Kong

: A continuation...

I don't think I can quite go through everything I experienced in India, so I'll just do what I can on this blog, and leave the rest in my head, where images still appear in my dreams even after a week of being back.
A couple things on India:

*Driving on the street gets pretty crazy.*

Cars don't drive inside the lanes! This I experienced pretty quickly in India, when the driver took us from the airport to the hotel. They seem to like to hover over the middle white line that divides the road into two lanes. Everyone always seems to be in a hurry, so if the rickshaw/car/bus/large truck with a load the size of an elephant/etc. is going too slowly in front of you, you simply honk your horn for them to move over to let you go ahead. But you don't just honk. You HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK (seriously) until the vehicle in front of you moves over. And even IF you can clearly see that the vehicle in front of you can't move over for whatever reason, you still HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK HONK HONK HOOOOOOOOOOOOONK until they do so. Even if the vehicle in front of you is still a few seconds away from being directly in front of you, you still HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK until they move, just to get a head start. It gets very loud and annoying sitting on the road, let me tell you.

However, many of the large trucks have two words painted on the back of the truck or rear bumper: HONK PLEASE. So I guess it's normal to be honked at. Another thing I noticed was that many of their heavy loaded trucks are all very brightly painted and decorated. They're fun to look at, especially when the honking gets not so fun.

Many times, depending on what part of the city you're at (we were mostly in Delhi), I'm guessing the light signals are merely "suggestions" rather than the law. There were a couple times when after we crossed a street, I thought to myself, "Self, did we just go through a red light?" To which I would reply to myself, "Self, I belive we just did."

On the very first day of our 5 day tour, within 10 minutes of getting into our car, the car's right side mirror got sideswipped by this huge bus. That's how close the bus came to us.

The streets there were farily dusty. Parts of the main roads were paved, but the sidewalks weren't. Everywhere I went I felt like there was dust everywhere. Not to mention cows. People keep asking me if I saw cows. Yup. I saw cows. Lots of them. Most of the time just chillaxing on the street, or trying to find something to eat. Most of them looked like they were in pretty bad shape though, either really skinny, or really dirty. None of them looked particularly happy, not at all like those prankster california cows that they're always showing on TV. I also saw several elephants, monkeys (which, as cute as they are, you have to stay away from), yaks, camels, and of course, a snake charmer with a cobra that came out of the basket when he played his flute thing.

Oh, and along the way, I saw men (of all ages) just peeing along the side of the road, or against a wall. Speaking of men:

*Men in India are not afraid to show their feelings.*

I saw alot of men in India holding hands with other men. Either alone together, walking down the street, with a group of other friends, you name it, they hold hands. They also get very huggy with each other. And yes, they're still completely heterosexual. Trust me, we asked. It was a little surprising at first to see, but I'm glad that they're ok being so open about showing their affection for their friends.

I don't think I'll get into all the temples, museums, and monuments we saw on our trip. Too many to name, and the pictures would probably do it better justice than whatever I can say about them. Actually, no. The pictures themselves probably won't do the real places any justice either...I'm a bad photographer anyway. I can't say that my experience is totally representative of India since most of the places we went to were tourist areas. So if you're really all that interested about the things I saw, I guess you'll have to go there yourself and experience it.

One thing I did love in India was their movies. I watched parts of 2 movies on the busses, and even though I couldn't understand what they were saying, I still got the gist of it, and I LOVE those dance numbers. The guys dance, the girls dance in their sexy clothes, and they just dance dance dance while they sing sing sing, and everything is really bright and colorful. How can one not be happy after watching one of those singing dance numbers? How?

I do have to say though, that I've become quite proficient at squatting down to pee. You do something enough times, you're bound to get good at it, even if you weren't to begin with.

HONG KONG...

...was awesome! For some reason, I really liked Hong Kong. Maybe it was because it was so much more comfortable than India. Maybe because everyone there is Chinese and I can relate and just blend in. Maybe it was because everything seemed familiar and reminded me of my early childhood in Taiwan. Or maybe it was just because there was food everywhere? Yea, probably. (Oh, and plus Hong Kong is just fun to say in English. I usually say it with an accent ala Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany's.)

Everywhere you go, there is a restaurant in front, in back, to the sides of wherever you are. Small or large (but usually small). I smelled chinese food all the time! (Which was a great change from all the curry smells that made me nauseous in India, AND, the lack of any chinese food smells in Burbank.) And most places stay open pretty late...imagine having noodles after midnight....oh the life.

Public transportation there consists of nice and clean double decker buses, clean subways, taxis everywhere, and mini buses (which are suppose to be faster than the big busses I think). It was really easy to get around. And all you do is buy a Supercard in advance, and you can just scan it through on the busses or subways. It's so fast and easy, and there's no fishing in your pockets for change. I'm starting to sound like a commercial for Hong Kong...

And did I mention the food? Hong Kong is famous for their seafood, which, when I realized it, thought, it's ok, I can just eat rice. (I'm not a huge seafood fan...I'll eat fish, but I can pass on all the other stuff.) But there was one night where we had a seafood feast, and I tried everything, even things I didn't think I would ever eat, and it was all so delicious. SO DELICIOUS!!!! I still don't know what some of the stuff I ate was. But I know it was darn tasty. I left that night with a full stomach and a new outlook on seafood. Well...at least the kind in Hong Kong.

Even though I have lived in Taiwan and New Jersey, I mostly grew up in Southern California...Orange County no less, and I've always been aware that I live in a bubble. So whenever I go to a new place I always wonder if I can ever live there, if my coffee drinking, corolla driving, celebrity sighting, flip flop wearing, Hollywood trashtalk, sunny-all-the-time-without-humidity, reality TV filled way of life could ever adapt to a new environment. I think I could in Hong Kong. I think I'd be able to toss up my beret, do a twirl in the street, and make it there afterall...should I ever choose to.

I guess we'll see.