When will this impetuous rain ever stop?

The rain is creating havoc in socal. For instance:

Today it took me an hour to get to work. My car and I were moving at the speed of a mule. I blame the rain.
Today it smelled like a dead rat in the women's bathroom. Don't ask me how I know what dead rats smell like. I blame the rain.
A few minutes ago, there was a loud gunshot like noise near my apartment. Everyone got out to figure out what it was. Our community of single apartments bonded over a gunshot that turned out to be just a transformer blowing up. I blame the rain.
My socks are wet. I blame the rain.
I can't ride my bike. I blame the rain.

I think the rain can hear my blogging, because it just started pouring like mad. Alright alright!! I didn't mean it!!

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I've been watching movies. Eternal Sunshine and Life Aquatic come to mind. They're different. I like them. It's been a while since I've really enjoyed a movie. That makes me wonder...at school I majored in film. I came out here to be a part of films. And somehow I ended up where I am.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining. I enjoy my job. I love the people I work with. I feel lucky to even have the kind of job I have. There's really not much for me to complain about. But every once in a while, I start thinking about why I'm doing what I'm doing, and what I want to do. Oh that dreaded question. "What do you want to do?" It's been haunting me ever since highschool. I was hoping by the time I graduated I would know the answer to that question. Well, I do know the answer, I guess I was hoping I would know a different one. The answer is: I DON'T KNOW.

It's like the opening scene in Reality Bites where Winona Ryder is making her speech and she loses her note cards, and her answer to this big question was: I don't know. And the whole crowd cheered for her for having such a wonderful answer to such an important question. Well, where's my cheering section, dammit? Everytime I'm asked that question, and I answer with "I don't know," I'm always secretly hoping for some magical crowd in a corner ready to burst into a standing ovation. And then I can walk across the stage, receive my diploma, throw my hat in the air, and go make out with Ethan Hawk.

So much for that.

In life, the "I don't know" answer always makes me sound incompetent and maybe even a little ditzy. The real answer to them is, "If I knew what I wanted to be doing, I'd be doing it. Or at least going through the necessary steps to get there." Is it so bad that I don't know what I want to be doing? Why would I want to put myself in a corner by giving a definite answer to that question if I want to do and experience everything? There's just so much out there.

But I guess there is a reason behind asking the question. I'm guilty of it myself from time to time. People need direction. Some sort of road map. And answering that dreaded question puts you closer on the map. Or something like that.

One day, I'd still like to become a professional whistler... No one would take me seriously if that was my answer to that dreaded question. But I could either be the next Gwen Stefani (of the whistling world), or I can get sick of it after a month. Who knows? Who ever knows what will happen? So why answer such big questions?

This blog blows.