Unemployment, Day 2

So far, so good.

I'm not losing my mind yet. Though i'm talking to myself alot more in the car. I've been trying to get alot done and have actually been quite productive. Gone to the bank, post office, did taxes, made several customer service calls, applied for unemployment...just trying to get odds and ends in order. I'm trying really hard to stick to some sort of a schedule so i'm not up reading or watching movies til 3am and not waking up til noon. But then today i thought about it, and...why not? No one's stopping me! But still...must stick to some sort of schedule, for my own sanity.

From being unemployed last time, I've learned that one spends more money when one is not making money, than when one is making money. Funny how that works. I guess you have all this free time and what better way to fill it than spend some money? So i'm also trying really hard not to do that...and of course, end up at Bed Bath and Beyond yesterday because I felt I really needed an air tight coffee canister. That is, for the trader joes coffee beans I bought the other day that was constantly emanating this wonderful coffee smell, making me want coffee whenever i passed by my kitchen, but more like 24/7. That is, coffee made from the french press i bought over the weekend, because now that i'm not getting office coffee, i must get it somewhere, so I might as well make it at home. See...see how the vicious cycle works?

So yesterday as I was checking out at BBB, I saw Sandra Oh in front of me, two 'o clock. After i discreetly stared at her to make sure it was her, i shrugged it off, because yes, she's just another human being, who cares. So as i went to check out, i noticed lady A behind the counter whispering to lady B, and staring in the direction of Sandra. I heard her whisper, "yknow,from grey's anatomy. That's my favorite show." Lady B seemed confused and finally looked up at me, and asked lady A, "HER?" I laughed, shook my head, and said, "no, HER!" and pointed my head in sandra's direction. Discreetly, of course. Lady B was still confused, but lady A and I shared a good chuckle. That's why I love LA man...the city where I can get mistaken as the OTHER asian actress.

I think as long as I don't start drinking in the afternoon, I'll be a-ok. And to prevent that from happening, I'm going to go finish the two beers left in the fridge.

Haha, just kidding.







There's only one left anyway.

The Cereal Bowl

As i was putting my dishes away tonight, i suddenly realized that i've been ignoring my cereal bowl. My lovely petite little choux of a bowl, a sunny colored yellow bowl with a little gnome playing an accordion on the side. As if eating cereal didn't make me happy enough, this bowl just puts it over the top. I mean how often during the day do you get to see a gnome playing the according for you while you eat? That's what i'm saying! I got this bowl especially for cereal on my first trip back to NYC with SW. It was my special NYC purchase, something to remind me of the lovely city, and the fantabulous trip. I can't believe i've been neglecting it in the back of the cupboards. I shake my head at myself.

Anyway, so I washed it, and now it is drying for me and my cereal in the morning. I can't wait.

Paging Robert Buckley...

YES YES YES!!

I knew it. My memories aren't against me after all! So, after a confirmation email from JB, I did, in fact, go to school with HOT BOY, aka Robert, but I'll stick with HOT BOY. I believe i was in on some study session with him and some other people in a suite lounge on a floor of Tioga or Tenaya, studying for an econ final that I eventually bombed. Perhaps i was too distracted? Ha, who am i kidding, i just really sucked as an econ major. Too bad it was only a study session and not a MAKE OUT SESSION! Damn, those were the days. If i could only travel back in time and re-live those moments again. Suh-weet!!

Ok, but, all that aside, it's kind of a bummer that he is so hot. He's actually not bad of an actor, but with a body like that and those boyishly good looks, and those blue eyes, and that smile....oh that smile........hm...where was I? He's not bad of an actor, but I fear for him that he will be forever cast in these hot boy roles. I don't know where he wants to take this acting thing or how serious he is with it, but i'd love to say some day with fervor and excitement, "I had econ classes with Edward Norton" but instead of Ed, I'd insert Rob's name. You know, someone that is hot AND recognized for his great acting. But I guess everyone's gotta start somewhere, and being THE up and coming hot boy isn't so bad for now. We'll just have to wait and see!

Thank you India

Last night as I was drifting off into sleep but not quite asleep yet, I suddenly smelled India. Which then pulled me out of my almost asleep state. How weird is it to suddenly smell a country hundreds of miles away? Of course, I wasn't really sleeping in a room that smelled like India, my Brain was smelling India. But why would my Brain suddenly pull this smell from the depths of my memories, out of nowhere, at a seemingly random time?

The smell was quite strong, and though it only lasted for maybe 10 seconds, I suddenly felt like I was transported back. I saw the dirty streets at night, and the old men and their tea, and the restaurants we ate at. But I was still not asleep. I only saw these images in my head. Then the smell slowly faded away, and I longed for it to return. So I thought some more about the images in my head, and tried to remember more things. And then the weirdest thing: as I recalled my memories, the smell came back! The stronger a memory was, the stronger the smell became. I made a note to blog about it in the morning, and slowly drifted off to dreamland.

Unfortunately, I did not have any dreams of India. Even now, as I try to recall the images I saw last night...no smell...nothing...just the smell of regular air inside my nose. The curry smell is gone. The foreign new place smell is gone. And it wasn't just the smell of curry, it was intermingled with something else I can't quite put my finger on. Spices, perhaps, as that's what everyone seems to say India smells like. Or maybe it was just a smell my Brain created from my memories of India. (But really, I don't think my Brain is that clever, sorry Brain.) I'm sad it is gone now, but grateful that I was able to have such a wonderful olfactory experience last night.

Proof #136

Another example that Tina Fey and I are really the same person:

In episode #113, The Fighting Irish, Liz Lemmon goes to the gym and happens to meet up with Flower Guy and his GF.
A. The seemingly perfect guys always have cute attractive gfs to throw in your face.
B. They're in a hip hop class where everyone knew the routine perfectly except for Liz...or should i say, Tina Fey.........or should I say............ME?
C. Immediately afterwards, Liz is watching one of my favorite videos, the one with the baby panda sneezing.

If those three points combined don't prove that I am Tina Fey, I don't know what does.

Random thoughts...#258

It really amazes me how quickly one can spend $50 at Target. Like poof, it's just gone. And for what, a few things here, a few things there. (And some cool flip flops.)

So we're on countdown...8 more days until I am officially unemployed. The last imf-er standing. Kind of ironic to me. And i still have about 489 business cards in my name that i can no longer use. Perhaps i can create some sort of art project out of it. Make a house of cards? And then destroy it on a rampage...falling house of cards...analogy for the fate of said job? Perhaps? Yea, i'll sit on that for a bit.

I heart Tina Fey

I heart her sooooooo much.

Oh my oh my...

In telling this story, I'm gonna have to admit something embarrassing.

So...I watch Lipstick Jungle. I know, i know. But i do. And there's this hot boy on the show. Aside from the fact that his face is super cute and he has the most adorable smile and his body is incredibly HOT....um where was i?

Oh yea, so i see him on tv, and think he looks very strangely familiar, but can't place him in any WB shows i've seen. So tonight i'm watching him, and it just bugs me to no end how familiar he looks, so i start IMDB'ing him to see what shows i've seen him in. Realize he hasn't been in anything I would've watched...but find out his name is Robert Buckley. Hm...sounds oddly familiar. So i do some more digging, and see that he went to UCSD as well!! Hm...interesting. Look up his age, same age as me!!!!! He was an econ major....I was an econ major to begin with too!! And then WOOOSH. I suddenly have these vague memories in the back of my head pop in. Is it possible that I went to school with HOT BOY and even had some econ classes with him????? I'm giddy just thinking about it.

I currently have an email out to a friend who might have been friends with him. I can't wait for her reply. I mean, his name is just so familiar, as is his face....probably because I thought he was super hot back then too and have since burned the image of his face into the back of my corneas. Maybe? I even think he was in the same college as me, Muir, and lived in the Other building, on the 8th or 9th floor, the cool floor. And might have been friends with said friend. So...i can't possibly have all these memories of him if it wasn't true right? Man o man...i wish there was someone i can ask about this right now. I might have gone to school with HOT BOY!!! We might even have had a conversation or two!!!

HOT BOY, if you're reading this, contact me. I mean...Robert.

And if you have no idea who i'm talking about, just look him up. Seriously. He is HOT. HAWT.

Oh no.

I just went to get some soup at my Chinese take out of choice, and the guy there knew what I wanted...before I ordered it! Damn. Did you guys ever see "While you were sleeping"? Where Lucy was always ordering for one, and that chinese place always pointed it out? Damn chinese take out places! Damn Them!! It's fine when you go to starbucks and they know your name and know what you want. (Even though they usually don't for me...lame.) But when your chinese takeout place knows...then it's embarrassing.

So i mailed in my trial by declaration today. I'll be waiting to see what they say back. Crossing my fingers...

Pictures!

Wow, i just sat through 6 episodes straight of 30 Rock, 1st season, 2nd disc. THIS IS MY NEW FAVORITE SHOW!! Liz Lemmon is my new Carrie Bradshaw replacement. It's a great show to watch when you're sick and your head is fuzzy, and you just want a good laugh. And several good laughs I had! I just can't get over how good this show is. I love it so much I just want to take it behind a middle school and get it pregnant. Muahahahah.

In other news, here are some pictures from the toilet restaurant in Taiwan, as promised many many moons ago. Enjoy!

Sugar withdraw?

OMG, i currently have the worst headache ever, and feel quite nauseous. I wonder if this has anything to do with my no sugar week. Maybe this is how drug addicts feel when they're trying to quit. On a much worse level, i'm sure. But man, i feel like crap. I hope it goes away.

No Sugar Week: Day 5

Hm...just doesn't have the same excitement and ring to it as shark week...

So this week I have decided to cut back on processed sugar. I say cut back instead of cut out because it seems as though i just can't avoid it, it's in everything! So i'm cutting back on the obvious: sugar in my coffee, cookies, ice cream...you get the idea. And the not so obvious I haven't been able to avoid? Sugar in my yogurt, sugar in my jelly (what else can i put on my muffins??)meals when i eat out, sugar in spaghetti sauce, and so on. But at least this some sort of step in the right direction, right?

I partially did this just to say to myself I can do it. I'm always thinking I can do things if i really wanted to, but never end up doing it, so technically, I can't do anything if i don't actually do it, right? Maybe i should take up smoking just so i can say i'm able to quit. Ha. Hahaha.

So far i've made it to day 5. But the weekend is upon us, and oh i'm scared. I've got birthdays to celebrate and college friends to meet up with. That spells sugar all over! So far i'm feeling pretty good, but i can't tell if its because i'm not putting poison in my body, or if its because i'm just really proud of myself for getting this far. Probably the latter.

Justache

As ryan says, it's "just a stache."

Which is what i wish i had. I might have blogged about this already so hear me out again...but...the longer my hair gets, the more i play with it. And when i say play, i really mean twirl. In the office, in the car, while having a drink at the bar. (A lil matt damon reference...teehee)

Alot of the times, i find myself twirling my hair for no good reason, and then wondering if the guy in the car next to me thinks i'm the biggest ditz ever. Good thing i don't chew gum...oy vey.

Now if i had a mustache, that'd be a complete different story. I'd twirl my mustache instead of my hair, and man, instead of ditzy, i'd look really....well probably manly. But it's like looking smarter when you wear glasses. I feel like i'd look more accomplished if i twirled my mustache instead, as if i'm always deep in thought. Which...is actually what i'm doing when i twirl my hair too. It just doesn't come across that way i guess. It'd also help if i had a legit english accent while i twirled my mustache. Hm...yes. Gotta work on that.

I bought two avocados today, for the first time ever. It's funny, i've never really liked avocados, but within the past year or so, they've really grown on me. i once had them at ms. parker's house with just a bit of salt, and it was actually quite good! and so when i saw them today i suddenly had a craving for salted avocado. except....how do i know when they're ready to eat? ms parker?

ok, so i've been watching this video non stop. It's funny, and really original. I wish i had come up with it. And i wish i was the one to edit it! If only i could put that in my reel.




Speaking of my reel, i finally got some sort of website up. whew. long time coming. But i had to scramble this weekend. And scrambling never comes out well. Except eggs. Mm...scramble eggs...with a dash of ketchup!

Just another saturday night...

So rather than go to an art show with vonne tonight, I somehow lost all track of time and ended up working on my website all night. Yes, the website that's been like a thorn at my side. The one that I didn't know how to get started on. Well...i'm about 60% there, thank goodness. This needs to be done this weekend, as there are demands and needs to be met! Oh the anticipation!

I hate that time after you've applied for that seemingly perfect job. The possibilities! The dreams! And then a week goes by...a month...and you realize maybe you're not so perfect for that job after-all. Ha. Days since applying for said job: 2.

I left the tv on while working on the website tonight. Listened to Oldschool in the background, and some very funny skits on SNL. And now.....Showtime at the Apollo! Not only that, its a "best of" show. Who needs to go see Step Up 2 when there's Showtime at the Apollo? Not that this blogger has any desires to see Step Up 2. No siree. Boy, people really get excited on this show!

Well, off to bed soon and then getting up to work on the site some more as I will be landlocked in the morning, thanks to people who like to run for shits and giggles. Ok ok, I won't be a hater...just because I don't run and am accruing office butt, that doesn't mean I need to hate on people who enjoy a good sweat. So here's to you, 26 mile marathon runners! May you have a great (and fast) run in the morning. I'll be counting the minutes til the streets open up!

How does one sell oneself?

And no, i don't mean the type of transactions on the street corner, you dirty thing. I mean, how do you build yourself up into this great awesome person for other people when sometimes you really doubt it yourself? It's hard to do I think. Don't you?

Warm Weather

Today i walked out of the office after work and felt like it was spring time. It was oddly warm, and there was actually light out. What's going on? Is it spring already?

But i do love the later sunsets. You just feel like you have more time in the day to get your stuff done when its light outside.

And apparently, tuesday nights around 8:30 are when the cute boys shop at the grocery store. Perhaps their gfs have all taken over the tele for American Idol night, and they just need to get out for a breather, a quick smokey smoke, some ice cold beers to claim their manhood back. Perhaps? In any case, i was unprepared for such a barrage of dapper fellows milling about, so i quickly gathered my mango and apples and yogurt and Bass (on sale!) to make a quick exit, only to be slowed down by the self-checker...yeah, that self-checker that's suppose to let you check out quicker, make that quick exit easy for you in such situations. I had to wait to get the apples weighed and cleared and the mango weighed and cleared and my id checked and blah blah blah.

After all that though, I did get to leave with Ben and Jerry. I know they will make me very happy.

Random thoughts...

Is it weird that it kinda bothers me when I log on to my online bank account, and my bank greets me with, Welcome Back, Wang?
It really just puts me off for some reason. They obviously have my full name in the database, why can't they greet me with my first name? It would sound a lot more personal, don't you think? It just kinda creeps me out. Like my computer is my football coach or something, and every time i want to check my balance, my coach is there to greet me, but instead he is shouting it...using my last name. Maybe if i'm good and have a large balance when i log off, i'll get a slap on the ass for a job well done?

And...fruit on the bottom yogurt. Why? I pondered this as i ate my fruit on the bottom yogurt today...as i furiously mixed to get the fruit to mix in evenly with the rest of the yogurt. If they put the fruit on the top, by the time it gets to me, it'll practically be all mixed in already. If they mixed the fruit with the yogurt...wow, what a concept, I'd be able to eat it immediately! Not that its THAT hard to mix my own fruit in the yogurt from the very very bottom of the cup (where the corners indent out...blueberry likes to hide out there), but they very specifically include on the label "with Fruit on the bottom" as if its a big selling point. As if i would be more likely to buy the yogurt if i can mix in the fruit on my own? I just don't get it.

Other Random Banterings

Last night i realized that i kinda have a crush on Ira Glass. Sure he is my hero...but...part time lover? One can only dream. I really love him.

It's 7:43pm. The oscars are on in the background, and i will shortly be in bed. I've been up for the past 36 hours, with only about 1.5 hours of sleep. Things are starting to blur, and my eyes grow heavy. Aren't you glad, dedicated reader, that I'm even taking this time to blog??

"She has a proclivity for everyone else's shoes, and mischief on her face."
Perhaps that is how I will begin my greatest song of all time. By george, that's it!

Alright, time for the oscar for most original song...I hope ONCE wins!!

OMG! And they did!! No surprise, but gosh, how great for them! Golly gee...

LOST

I've lost it! I've lost my creativity! It's gone! It fell out of my pocket somewhere back in college, and now it's probably just sitting in the grass by itself, getting wet from the sprinklers, being sniffed by a dog...and then probably shat on.

I should be working on my website. My website that used to be endless joy for me to create...but now I'm stuck on little things...like color scheme and the perfect name and fonts and layout. Instead i'm here whine-blogging about it, procrastinating until who knows when.

This is exactly like my inabilities to decorate my apartment. Too many choices, can't make a decision. I just need to do and go.

Ok, here i go...

Gone Postal

I just spent 30min waiting in line at the post office for 75cents worth of postage. Yes i'm serious. I stood behind the cutest girl though, she was very nice, and we bonded after her cell phone attacked me. I think I wouldn't mind working at the post office after I retire. I mean, the hours are regular and you get all the government holidays. Plus those snazzy uniforms...I wouldn't have to worry about what to wear all the time then. I could work behind the counter, or be one of those walking postwomen and get exercise everyday. The only problem would be getting around those dogs....

Well, after all that waiting, I simply couldn't just walk out of there paying .75cents of postage. So i got me some superhero stamps. They're quite awesome I must say. Give me a reason to mail you something.

Words and words

Sigh...so i was this close to finishing a personal project 2 years in the making...and then I just found a major error. So i started to fix it and decided to procrastinate by blogging.

Blog blog blog.

So, one catchy candy jingle and a mediocre try at a song later, I still don't have that great song written. That one great belt out in your car, cry your heart out, can't get out of your head, I've gotta put it on loop song. There's already too many about unrequited love, love lost, crazy in love, heart break heart ache songs out there...maybe i'll write one about recalled beef, there's never enough of those...trust me, when I get it right you'll hear about it. Maybe you'll even sing about it.

Time to get back to work...I'm on a deadline.

Book parties and such...

Who would've thought that being at a party with my name is earl and hyde would be a snore in the land of doldrums? The event piqued Vonne and my own curiosity, but i soon learned that nothing really goes on at a book party. To be fair I only knew the author's brother (who himself had not read the book), and Vonne arrived way after us. If I had been friends with these people or made an attempt to start conversations with any of them, it might've been somewhat interesting. (The event, not the company i was with.) But instead i stuck to Y+T, discussing the merits of having large text on walls as an alternative to wallpaper. (Quite an interesting idea I must say.)

So instead, we bid the party adieu and sauntered over to Cosmo's for what turned out to be a fantastic night of ancient Japanese hiccup secret cures and drunken karaoke. And boy, what karaoke! Old japanese men crooning to old japanese hits, vonne's melodious rendition of jill scott, JV and I making THAT CHANGE per Michael J's request, Bryan Adams appearing out of NOWHERE, and on and on. Karaoke makes the world a magical place. It really does.

Next up: I really must unload my camera and upload some pictures. It's been months. I see other people's blogs full of pictures and videos, and it really just adds to the blog-mosphere. I know i'm trying to keep myself somewhat anonymous, but really, my two readers already know who I am and those who fall into the blog by chance...well, I'm guessing that they just pick themselves up and are on their merry little way very quickly. So if i'm hip enough to have an rss feed, I think its time to start putting up pictures...don't you think?

Ugh

AND! And i have a big zit growing on my face. It's annoying and it hurts. They always like to emerge from the same place. You think it went away or you killed it, but no, it just goes on vacation every once in a while, but it returns. TO THE SAME PLACE. GD it!

Thursday

Geez, i look like crap today. Especially more so than usual, just to spite this non holiday that is a pain in our ass. I nearly screamed when i saw all the teddy bears and flowers on the side of the road this morning. Stuffed animals are a waste of money. Especially when they're gigantic, and not going to a needy child. Especially when they're seasonal, and holding a red heart. I hate seasonal stuff....like plates. Like when you walk into Target or Linen's n Things, they always have plate sets for that particular holiday. Halloween plates and christmas plates and valentines day plates and fall plates and summer plates...ugh. You only need one set of plates!!!

Although this morning i did get some heart shaped candies from a fellow coworker, and for 2 minutes i was brought back to third grade when we made paper bag envelopes and suddenly i panicked cuz i felt like i forgot to write out HER valentine. But then i reminded myself, oh, its a non holiday, chillax. But still, it was very nice of her.

I'm in an awful mood today, unrelated to this non holiday, so I thank you for letting me rant. Perhaps there will be more later.

At last!!

The strike is over. Thank goodness.

Over and out.

Move along

Lately I've been thinking about moving. NY? SF? I know some people there. Out of the country? But it'd be hard to find a job and get a permit and all that. France? Australia? Canada? Too bad I don't know anyone in canada...it'd be a great mix of english, french, chinese....plus there's some production up there, so a job may be more likely. I mean, come on, Canada is the home of Degrassi the next generation, what could be sweeter? It's hard to move to a place where you don't know people. It's hard to move to a place when you DO know people! Moving is just hard in general. But it'd be a nice change of pace. Too bad I can't get myself on the production of LOST. I hear hawaii's nice this time of year...

This just in...

Oh my...what do I do??

So i just let my machine pick up two phone calls...first time the guy was confused, second time he left a message.

His name is robert, and he's making reservations for two for...VALENTINES DAY!!!!!! The second session, whatever that means. I wonder which restaurant he thinks he called....

Thing is, my phone is connect to the keypad to get in. So, i've gotten calls from people wanting to get in and stuff....so i just stopped answering my phone. And my message says, "Please leave a message." That's it. No name, no nothin. I didn't want to say my name on the machine because people who call from the keypad downstairs will get the machine message if i don't pick up, and know my name! Anyways, its a pretty intricate system of avoidance I've set up, don't question it.

But..so...what do i do? I don't want to call him back! But i also don't want to be the reason him and his date are stranded on valentines day! He spelled out his name and left a number and everything!

Thanks alot valentines day! If you didn't exist, none of this would've happened. You're not a real holiday anyway so stop acting like one!


*********NEXT DAY UPDATE*********

So i called the DOOD back this morning, trying to explain that he called me...the wrong number...valentine's day reservations? He either couldn't hear me, or couldn't understand me, so i guess the next logical thing to do was....hang up on me?

Thanks mr. Thanks a million. Trying to do you a favor and get you possibly laid on Vday, and what do you do? Hang up on me???

Sigh.

So in my quest to save their relationship, i texted him back. "You dialed the wrong number last night for your reservations."
And, let me just say, that is a looooong sentence to text for someone who is text handicapped, and running late for work.

And oh what's this??
I just got a text back! It wasn't in vain after all! (i wasn't even sure if i dialed the right number, couldn't tell if he said 310 or 210 on the message) So he just texted back "U r rite my apologiz"

Hooray! SH saves the day! Boy, I'm tired...now i know how Batman feels. That's enough good deeds for the day MONTH.

This played out in my head last night...dim the lights.

Lady with blonde curly hair, freshly done nails, snapping gum in mouth:
"Ugh, but Harry, you said you MADE reservations!!"

Man with open shirt, gold chains:
"But hon, i did, i promise. Check the list again will ya kid? I called and left a message last week!"

Red haired kid with freckles and suit:
"I'm sorry sir, you're not on this list, we didn't get a call from you last week. Please, sir, step away from the book...I can't take your money sir, we are all filled up, I really can't get you a table. Sir...sir, please, personal space..."

Lady:
"I give you one thing to do harry, ONE THING, and you can't even remembah to do it."

Harry:
zoom in on sad face....cue trumpet sound fx: wop wop wop wop wwwwwop!

AND SCENE.

Picture

I just got this picture from T and had to share it. It's a pretty funny picture of C and I, but...is that a fat long haired luke wilson sitting next to my presents?? Nice of him to show up to my birthday...hahaha. One year Dax Shepard was having dinner at the same time as my party, and then later, Jason Schwartzman came for karoake. I mean, the real guy! Not this luke wilson imposter. It's ok, the more the merrier.

It's always better on holiday...

Lately, i feel like a tornado, pretty much a wreck, mentally and emotionally. This year so far has been..tumultuous, to say the least. I've hit the lows and then climbed back to the OK corral only to go back down again. If it's not one thing its another. I'm tired from these spikes...I just want to plateau at steady and sip some champagne. But i guess all these emotional spikes just means i'm alive...not dead. I just want a vacation from my head. Like in cartoons when the ghost spirit steps away from the body. Then, i can just push the automate button in the back of my head, underneath all that hair, and just float away while my automaton body continues to be me. Just for a little while.

I had a lovely date tonight with the bff in the oc. The drive there was horrendous, worse than expected. But we rarely get alone time anymore so it was nice to just have dinner (though quickly cuz we were running late for the show) and chat. The show was BLAST, and it was pretty good, some parts better than others, but there were really some awesome amazing musicians I saw tonight. The drummers were pretty incredible, i just don't know how they do it. That's the one thing i don't care much for in Rock Band. I'll let the others fight over the drums as long as i can rock out to something else on...11.

Shadow of the Day

Normally I'm not a huge fan of Linkin Park...in fact I don't think i'm a fan at all...til this song. It's such a great song...so very U2 like. It's quite a change from the usual stuff. It's such a great song title too. I think i can write a novel titled, Shadow of the Day, and it'll be a best seller based on the title alone. Reminds me of one of the Enders game books...hm...kinda want to read that now.

Now one of the many things that really bums me out about the end of imf is the end of my world music knowledge. Where else now will i find out about artists like sia and miyavi and verdena? I had it all at my fingertips, and now, poof, it's all gone. And sure, i watched alot of really bad hip hop videos about hos in different area codes, but the good ones...the really good videos make it all worth it. You know what this is like?

It's like when the milkman drops off milk everyday for the little 5 year old boy. Orphan boy...of course. And suddenly one day, the milkman doesn't come anymore! Where will the little orphan boy get his milk? Sure they're out in grocery stores, but little orphan boy can't drive yet! He doesn't even know about grocery stores, he's only 5! And an orphan, of course. This is exactly what it's like.

Um..yea.

So you see, after that prime example i just made up on the spot, do you see how my novel would NOT be a best seller? I rest my case.

Elis Regina

Wow. I'm so in love. My itunes suddenly started playing Elis's Carinhoso...I've forgotten about this song and now I'm in love with her voice all over again. What is it about portuguese that makes it so romantic? It sounds like a very nasally language, which has the possibility to be annoying...but it isn't. Instead, it draws me in...and oh the guitar picking, oh this part is the best....and her voice is so sexy. I love you Ms. Regina.

Laws of Attraction

Some say it's all a numbers game. To me it's a very unromantic way to look at things. But then again, maybe romance was created in movies, made up by people who have now affected my ways of thinking. Who knows.

Going back to things being relative...I still can't quite put into words this relativity i think about all the time. Like distance. Hm..it's all up in the ether and I can't quite pull it down to articulate it.

I just wonder...

People who are married. People who have this person that they love, they get along great. Sure they have arguments here and there, but for the most part, this is the person you want to be with. What about the other love of your life that you've never met because he was hundreds of miles away on the other side of the earth? He could possibly be the love of your life except you'd never know it because you've never met. So all these people in love....they're in love with the one that's closest in proximity with them at the time. Sure there are lots of instances of people meeting their loves while on vacation on the other side of the world. But for the most part, people meet people they live close to. And yes, i know there's lots of long distance dating...and this is where it starts getting hazy for me and i can't quite explain what i'm thinking.

This business of being single...sometimes it's crappy, but other times, its the most wonderful thing in the world! Once you're in a relationship, you're closed for business. You're no longer open to the world of people. When you're single, everyone's a possibility. Then again, i'm sure you'll argue with me on this. Please do so.

Tomorrow is another day. A day where I will bring in my own half and half for my coffee. No more of that powder crap. You'd think that a company with fancy coffee machines would have some real milk somewhere, but alas, its all powder creamer. This makes me angry. But then again, just being in this new place makes me kinda angry. However, anger aside, i really do have it good right now, which is why i'm bringing in my own h/h. No more yelling at the powder creamer inside my head. It's not its fault. It's only fault is trying to be delicious when it clearly cannot. But then again, we all strive to be better in life, why shouldn't powder creamers do the same, right?

Right.

Elevators

Everyone in every big building always think they have shitty elevators. Thing is, i think elevators just break easily in general. I keep hearing the same kinds of conversations with elevators everywhere i go. The on at the apartment was down for a month, and before that probably once every week. (They recently got it fixed, we'll see how long that lasts.) The one at the old work was breaking down all the time. Today i got in the elevator here at new work with some pretty angry people. I just wanted to tell them, look, it happens everywhere you go. But I didn't. I just let them rant instead. I think they need that.

Just got a notice this morning...turns out my rent is going up. Oh joy.

Yikes!

I update my template and end up losing all my other blog buddies! ZUT! I can't remember the links!

Thar I blow...yarr

Boy it sure is windy outside. I almost got swept away! And it was so windy i could hardly breathe...it's crazy!!! What's going on!!!

Currently listening to kate nash and having vanilla ice cream...they go well together.....SO FAR. Still feeling her out, the ice cream can stay though.

Goodbyes

When I woke up this morning I was not expecting to end my day with a goodbye.  But alas, I found myself saying goodbye to my dear friend C at 5:45pm.  I guess unexpected goodbyes are better than the expected ones.  That way you're not counting the days until that awkward sad moment.  And it's nice to know that he's off to be with his beloved finally.  It's just too bad it had to be under such circumstances.  But i guess for them, it worked out ok.  

C and I hit it off pretty well.  Before I knew it, we were getting into long heated discussions about love, politics, life, and any other topics we can think of.  It's easy to get into these discussions when you both live back in the Cave, away from the outside warfare of the Pit.  While they dodged bullets and gambled their money away out there, we shared views and opinions in the safety and warmth of the cave.  That's not to say all was  peachy keen.  There were times where I could've strangled him for such brash and impertinent views, and I'm sure there were plenty of times where he thought the same.  But nonetheless, he was a good, dear friend to me.  

I remembered being surprised about his views on Sex and the City...that it was brilliantly written, and a great show.  Now, this opinion doesn't surprise me one bit, I know it to be true already, but it just surprised me that this was coming from a male.  And this was early in our relationship too.  We both agree that Aiden was better for Carrie than Big ever was.   Show me another guy that will say the same and I will give him a crown!

We celebrated each other's birthdays, we had a fondness for Once, and we both had a great time in the cave.  

I'm reminded of the quote from the post when A&S moved away, which is...hm..odd, I don't see it in there.  I thought i had posted this a while back when they moved away...

ok, so here it is:

For that which you love most in him may be clearer in his absense, as the mountain to the climber is clearer from the plain.

Great, now I'll be digging through old posts for this quote.  I KNOW I wrote it down before!

EXTRA EXTRA!

The DB today is unveiling it's step forward into the future! present. By popular demand from an anonymous spammer, you can now subscribe to DB through RSS. Huzzah! Pizza for all! Link is located at the bottom of the page.

Still working out kinks...wondering why I cannot post a title. May have something to do with this template. In any case, this look is kinda old...may need an update soon. More to come. For now, enjoy the feed. Pizza for all! Huzzah!

oh! oh!

ok, so this has nothing to do with the brilliant thought i had the other night, but it does deserve a post in the blogger.

ahem.

HOW SHE MOVE

Yes, yet another horrible paramount movie...OR IS IT? Ok, it is, i'm sure. But still...looks maybe kinda good, if you're into that whole choreographed hip hop crunking scene. Right? So like any of these types of movies, it usually wouldn't deserve a mention here...but there's just one thing that really bugs me about this movie.

THE TITLE!!!! IT'S GRAMMATICALLY INCORRECT!! Could someone at P not afford another consonant? I hope they lost their job over it. If it's meant to be grammatically incorrect to...I dunno, perhaps reflect the jargon of crazy dancing kids these days...then...then...oooooh I don't know. It makes me want to punch someone! And then maybe kick them while they're down on the ground...y'know, where it hurts. Hard.

That is all.

Please, discuss.

Whoa whoa...

Are spammers getting way way too high tech or are real readers asking for an RSS feed to the DB?

Hm...hard to tell. These spammers are good. They promise macys and starbucks cards. They have really interesting articles they want you to read. They post porn for you to click on. They are a high tech bunch, they are. And now...posing as interested readers?

Dot dot dot. The plot thickens.

I'm usually not one to get out of bed to write a brilliant idea down...though now looking back I should have. For some reason I always think I'll remember it with keywords or numbers or something that proves to be useless in the morning.

I had a good blog post that I was too lazy to get out of bed to write down. It had something to do with relativity...the intricacies of one thing relating to another at certain points in time. It was really brilliant at the time, but now I can't seem to remember the exact brilliantness of it. Since then, I"ve left a notebook by my bed for such instances of laziness. Let's hope that works.

It's weird with this layoff...things are happening slowly rather than all at once. It's stretching the sadness for far longer than I wish it to be. Things are just sinking in at a slower rate. Today I realized C is moving in a week. Possibly less. People moving away always makes me sad. I'm sure I've posted something about it in the past, so I won't repeat myself.

This is a bit late, but i recently went to the newly renovated observatory and found it to be quite inspiring. Maybe it's something to do with the spectacular view or the notions of the great big universe, but I just found the place really inspiring and really, just lovely. It really is a lovely place to be. Then again, I guess I had low expectation of this place having gone there as a kid. Back then I found the place boring, the planetarium show lame and uncomfortable, and probably had too short of an attention span to enjoy the view.

There was one particular moment while I was watching the planetarium show where LITERALLY, the light bulb went on above my head. (Ok, insert light bulb SH joke here...yadda yadda) But the lady in the show posed a question that I had thought about before but just for some reason, at that moment in time, it all made complete sense. It was a strange sensation. Can't say I've had many of those light bulb moments...it was really strange, but totally refreshing.

Currently listening to Rufus doing Judy. He's just fabulous. Would've loved to see this concert live. But the cd is just as good I suppose.

Oh goodie. Just finished up my internet traffic school. One ticket fixed, one more to go! As you can see, last year was not my year as far as cars and tickets go. Two traffic tickets, a tow, and...less luck with the parking? Hm...well, this is a new year. (Even though i started it by running through a red...eek.)

Got the new sia album. Awesome, as expected.

Today our channel went off the air, and was replaced by THE OTHER channel. Nothing was said, no ribbon was cut, no goodbyes cried. POOF, it was gone just like that. The only remnant left was the text crawl across the screen, something about the old becoming THE OTHER, and what THE OTHER was all about. No one could stand to watch it for more than five minutes. Not even I, a person who enjoys the type of content shown on THE OTHER. THE OTHER has now become the enemy, though it was only an innocent bystander. It's been a sad and somber week. People packing belongings. Empty offices. Speculations of past and future. Nailbiting nervousness for a fellow comrade who has only til the end of the week to stay in the country less she finds a sponsor. News of people moving. Moving far. To the east. coast. And I. I am left to watch all the mounting tension, the "see ya laters" and the K.I.T.s...the sad though optimistic goodbyes. For I was lucky enough to have been kept on for three more months. Who knows what the next three months will bring? Desperation as it charges to an end? New possibilities? Boredom? Increased productivity?

This is the part where the music swells as we cue the "boom" sound effect and quickly snap to black.

"Next time...on Daily Banterings...."

(And this is the part where you come back each week to find out what happens. I know i'll be on the edge of my seat.)

OMG OMG OMG.

I almost died just now. I just ran a red light on the way home. And I didn't even realize I was doing it until the car that could've hit me blasted his horn at me. I could've caused a major accident. All because I wasn't paying attention. My head was up in the clouds.

Dear Drivers of the intersection and the universe: I am so very incredibly sorry for my carelessness. I did not mean to cause you alarm and disturb your world on this peaceful sunday afternoon. I will be paying attention next time I'm out on the road.

I want to shout it from the rooftops!!

JANUARY IS NATIONAL VOLUNTEER BLOOD DONOR MONTH!!

Yes, it should be every month of the year. But for some reason, it is january. It has been way too long since my first donation, it's a good time to go back. Who's with me!

So apparently 2008 is THE year. The year that people I KNOW are getting married. People I KNOW!! Sure I've had friends get married. One here, one there. A year at a time. But it's looking like this is the year. I think everyone goes through "the" year. And it never comes slowly...it's all at once. So far, the people around me that are getting married: Mr. Diaz, Mr. Hawkes, Mr. Deines, Mr. Ha, Mr. McNiff, and the newest addition to the family: Ms. El Dessouky. And four of those are getting married in September. It'll be a busy fall. That is of course, if I'm invited. HA! If not, I won't have much to worry about. :)

It's raining cats and dogs outside! Thank goodness for that. I wish it wasn't so loud though. Makes it kinda scary...

Wow, guess everyone had the same idea i had this evening.

I went into trader joes today at 6pm on the dot, and it was PACKED!! Guess everyone wanted groceries after their first day back to work. I overheard somebody say "it's like no one was able to buy any food yesterday (so they're doing it today)!" Not so, my friend, not so. Grocery stores were opened yesterday, on the first day of the year. THEY WERE! Yet, everyone decided to wait til today. I guess maybe everyone was too hung over from new year's eve to shop for groceries yesterday. Lame.

I don't know if i'll be able to stay up for them tonight, but all the late night shows are coming back. I'm interested to see what they do. I hope the writers stop striking soon. It's going to start raining for the next week or so, and there will be a lot of drenched people out there. I feel bad for them. Someone said somewhere that the writers have lost more salary on strike than they would've earned with the deal they wanted. I mean, i don't know the details of it all, but it must be such a blow to the writers to hear this. And the person who said it and got it repeated over the airwaves probably wanted to do just that: sink the hearts of these writers and make them second guess what they're doing. War...what is it good for? (well, other than stupid reality shows...) Absolutely nothin.

Please. For the sake of good tv and the industry, kiss and make up already.

On a related topic, I was laid off today. More to come.

Well, leave it to the incredibly gay man-boy to give me a fantastic new cut. Or at least I thought it was fantastic at the time. Why is it you can never replicate your freshly cut salon hair? What was fantastic when he spun me around in my chair before we both jumped like little girls at my glee has now turned into this...mullet-esque wig like concoction. No, it's not him at all, it's just my hair. My uncooperative hair. So, as always...I'll give it a few more days to let the new DO settle in. In the event of any long term uncooperativeness - I've got several winter hats in queue.

So I have returned from the far east. Nothing to blog on that yet...if ever. My inner blog voice rarely emerged on this trip, therefore, little writing was done. According to my sister, I am still suffering from jetlag (as i write this at 1:24 in the AM.) At first I thought i was over it until she said, really? Don't you NOT want to wake up until late in the morning? (why...yes!) And, don't you NOT feel like sleeping until late at night? (why...yes yes!) The diagnosis? Jet Lag. That explains it! It seems as though i've been suffering from jet lag for several years now.

Why is it in the movies or on tv, people always fall in love so quickly? It's always love at first sight. To answer my own question: for practical reasons, i guess. No one's got the time to sit through a whole courtship, especially when dramas are only less than an hour. But in movies, many times: boy sees girl from window, girl sings song, and boy immediately falls in love with her. I'm talking about one movie in particular, but you can apply this formula to many movies. And then yknow, drama ensues, boy loses girl, ffwd to the end, boy reunites with girl, all is grand, and they live happily ever after. I'd like to see about movie about the ever after part. The part where they move in together to their new castle loft in the downtown village, and then really start to get to know each other. He finds that she has bad personal hygene (which is unfair to be critical of since everyone back then had bad hygene), and she finds him to be just a farm boy, not fit for the hip castle loft in the village. They find out that they're not so hot for each other after all, and that maybe their love was soley based on that first "look" and that first song. And then maybe they'll have wished that they didn't rush into things so quickly and that their love maybe wasn't based on that first glance, but rather, on his delutional state from not having eaten for days, and from her lapse of judgement due to not getting enough oxygen to the brain after being locked up for so long. (Plus she was singing at the time, which takes more oxygen away from the brain and uses up what little energy she had from not getting out and doing her daily calisthenics.) Then they'll have to go their separate ways, but not before deciding who gets to stay at the castle loft. But i digress.
My point is: ok. I lost my point. Perhaps i'll circle back to this another day.

So, last day of the year. I probably should spend some time on goal setting and personal achievements for the upcoming year...but I'm not going to. At least not today. I already know this year will start with a less than stellar start. But that's not to say I'm letting that dictate the direction for the rest of the year. There is hope that things will turn out fine, if not better than expected. Stellar could still very possibly be on the horizon.

For now, I'm wishing on the stars, and hoping for the best.

Happy New Year.

Ok so i realize haven't been keeping up with this. And, I'll also be out of the country for the next two weeks or so, so this could be my last post for a while. So let's make this worthwhile, yea?

First things first.

The Chipmunks movie. I KNOW it looks horrible. I KNOW it looks like another Garfield movie. I KNOW that animated creatures should not live on the same frame as live actors (except for Roger Rabbit, which I haven't seen, but heard was good?). I KNOW that we've all heard the alvin...Alvin...ALVIN!!! bit and know it all too well and it's..well, it's kinda lame. I know all this BUT. But i just have to say that the way they animated the chipmunks make them look really darn cute, and..and c'mon it's the chipmunks! Who didn't love the chipmunks? Who doesn't have their christmas album? Don't lie, you know you did. Mine is on tape, and if i still had a tape player, I'd be playing it right now as I type. So, even though I probably won't be seeing it in the theatres, I may..MAY just have to put it in my queue when it comes out on DVD.

Still no luck with writing that one great song. Or even a good song. Several band names in the queue though.

Geez, this is sad. My last post for a while and all I've got is chipmunks and no song? Boy this blog has hit rock bottom. Please come back in the new year. I promise it will be better. It'll be filled with new adventures overseas, movie reviews, what LAX is really like on Christmas eve, and perhaps a review on a toilet themed restaurant. Yes, you read me right. You'll just have to come back to see whether i'm pulling your chain or not. But really, I can't make that stuff up by myself, as great as you think this blog might be. I just really can't.

Happy Holidays to All, and to All a Goodnight!

Wow. How great was this years Victoria's Secret Fashion show???

For those of you that missed it: They had a whole collection dedicated to my man Magritte, and Dali!! A bunch of eye ball, umbrella, top hat, clouds type of images incorporated into their outfits. So awesome. I love weird shit like that. And the show is not just women walking in underwear. Ok...it kinda is. But they really think about each outfit, they're almost like costumes. Really well designed costumes that show off the VS line really well. It makes their stuff look really cute, not kinda tacky like when you walk in the store. This model had a green cape on that made her look like a christmas tree, so her sparkling bra and underwear were like ornaments on the tree. It's brilliant!! It's really a great marketing idea.

And, um, how much do we all want to be Heidi Klum? Geez! She's a gorgeous model, she has her own hit show, she looks fantabulous after having 2 kids, and she can actually sing! She did a duet with hubby Seal, it was pretty good.

Ok, I'll stop gushing now.

Also, today I received an email from a Dr. Sung Puckett who informed me that "Girls do not like you because your dick is too small." Thanks for the heads up Dr. Puckett. I can't believe you would actually take the time to tell me something so pointless. It's like making a housecall! Swell. I hope you enjoy your vacation in the Deleted Items folder.

How do people write songs? And not just any song, but a GOOD song. I just can't figure it out.
I wrote a song once. It was crappy.
So then i tried to disguise what i was actually writing about in the form of...cars? Was it...selling cars? Maybe I was a salesman selling a car? Buying a car? Something like that, I can't even remember what the metphor was about.
Then i wrote another song about boys. Or was it dancing. Or dancing with boys. Who knows.
Cady and I were suppose to write a song about surfing...I don't think we ever made it to the chorus.
This American Life had an episode about writing songs. It was funny and entertaining and inspiring. But still...nothing comes to mind.

And it's not like I haven't tried to study my favorite artists or songs to see what they're all about. But even the greatest songs, even my favorites...when you strip lyrics of its melody, and all you're left with is words....sometimes you're left with a beautiful poem. Or most likely, the poem sounds like crap too. But somehow...somehow the music hides the crapiness of the lyrics and it becomes a great song. Where is this going you ask? I haven't got a clue.

Wow. Can i just say AGAIN: askWoolyM. The link is right there, to your left. Just go and start reading. She answers so many good questions that I am always wondering about! I'm sure she can answer some of yours too. I emailed her to tell her what a great service she was providing, and she speedily replied. It's just fantastic, really.

Currently: waiting on an excellent dinner I made to heat up.

Next week people! Next week is the week!! Today in the elevator I suddenly thought I missed it, but then realized it's next week. What is it you ask? Victoria's Secret Fashion Show!! I accidently discovered this last year, as I had not thought much of models with oversized angel wings parading around lingerie in the past. But it really is a very entertaining hour or two of tv. And besides, everything else is reruns anyways, right?

I recently got the new ipod nano as a gift...and BOY is it a step up from my shuffle! Actually, it is several steps up. I'm still not used to it, its my first real ipod. First the space. 4 g's may not seem like much, but..BOY O BOY, its so much more than 512mb! No more deciding which albums are my favorite, and which one i'll have to leave out. And theres even room for podcasts!

Speaking of podcasts, i can WATCH them!! The other day at the airport, i was being a total nerd by watching a free podcast of FCP tips and tricks on my nano. Hooray for being a tech geek! (ok, not really)

And THEN! I can pick which albums i want to listen to! By artist, by album, whatever, I CHOOSE! Again, this may not seem like much if you've had an ipod since the beginning, but coming from Shuffle Land (aka, land of mentally noting what you've put into the shuffle, and then "next next next next next-ing" until you find that song you want), this is HUGE!

I can also load my address book from my computer on my nano? What? You mean have people's information on me when i travel? What? Stop it! But i can't! It keeps going!

A calendar? A clock??? You know how many times i've wanted to know what time it was on the plane but couldn't because the only time i had was on my turned off cell phone?

CRAZY!!!!

It's the little things I tell ya. Theres so much more, but I'm starting to sound like an ipod commercial.
Dinner is calling me, I must go give it some love.

Dear Mervyns and Coles:

What is wrong with you people? Doors open at 4am? Seriously? SERIOUSLY??


In other news: our apt. complex is now officially enrolled in recycling, to begin in 6-8 weeks. Next up, I will conquer the 16th floor suite, and perhaps...THE ENTIRE BUILDING. Muwahahahaha. Stay Tuned.

Dear Milo,

There are reports that you are getting snuggly with Hayden, that dolphin saving cheerleader costar of yours. Sigh. Ok. It's not like I ever really thought the idea of the two of us were in the stars. Really. And honestly, I don't really know Hayden, I'm sure she's a swell girl and all that (even though I cannot tell what all the hubbub is about for the life of me). But I loved the fact that you were with Rory G. And even though I know couples break up and move on...can't you date someone more like Rory than Hayden?? Puh-lease? For the sake of your fans! Not that it's really any of my business.

Sincerely yours,
SH

OMG, i just ran across this great site called askWoollyM. I have made a link to it on your left. Please go and read everything you can there, it's awesome!!!

Coincidentally, today I called my apt. manager to ask her to fix a lightswitch (for the xth time) and also to tell her about FREE LA city recycling for multi family complexes. She was interested and actually said she already looked into some recycling services but the property owners didn't want to pay for anything. In flies SH to the rescue, just in time! Of course, when I emailed the city they said they were backed up, and so we probably won't get this service for a while...but at least it's on its way. Hopefully. Fingers crossed!

Currently listening to: Cranberries. Boy they were great, whatever happened to them??

Sometimes my deep manly voice likes to emerge from a place of hiding, but it usually does so late at night. Once in a while though, it emerges in the day time, much to my chagrin. While my deep manly voice goes great with my manish PJs during the PM, it does nothing for my pretty pretty heels in the AM. It's wrong. All wrong. You know how when you talk you hear yourself one way, and then when you hear your recorded voice, it sounds completely foreign to you? Well, not only is my deep manly voice manly, it is smart too. It knows how to bypass that register where you think you sound fine, and manages to penetrate my ear sounding like my real recorded voice. My manly voice is a real pain in my ass.

In other news, it seems as though a lot of writers are comedians. They're just so funny! But i guess you have to be when you're writing for conan or steve carrell. I say, if this whole strike thing doesn't go well for them, they may be able to find some work in stand up. Maybe? Maybe? Bueller?

Oh joy oh happiness! Who would've ever thought I'd be this excited over email? Just found out that hotmail fixed their bug on reply emails. Before when you reply to an email, it was a block of garbage that no one can sort out. Now it is legibly formatted, much to my relief. I didn't want to have to give up my hotmail account over something silly like formatting! Now if only they would fix my send and receive time. It is currently 8 hours ahead of real time. I've tried looking into settings. Perhaps I have checked on the wrong time zone box? Nope. My emails are just 8 hours into the future. Annoying, but idealogically cool.

Punctuation is a funny thing. It can say so much without actually saying anything at all. See, i could've ended that last sentence with an (!) to further extend my excitement on punctuations, but instead I ended it with a (.), carrying an air of nonchalant coolness, as though I had my nose in the air while holding an extraordinarily long cigarette. AND THEN I CAN DO THIS AND TO YOU IT MAY SEEM LIKE I'M SHOUTING AT YOU, even though, all the while, I could've accidentally hit the CAPS lock. Or, I can type, OMG, MYOB, INBD! And you will know what I am trying to say. Well, some of you. Hahaha. The evolution of the written word these days amazes me to no end.

In other news, stayed home from work today to find that daytime TV is still just as bad as I remembered. Except now, it is even worse! With the writers on strike, Ellen is not so funny anymore. But then again, I've never found her THAT funny...so maybe she doesn't need writers after all? Also realized that the weather woman on kcal 9 has an enormous rack. I mean they're gargantuan!! They're never gratuitously displayed, in fact I think they're almost always covered, but they are still huge! Boy o boy.

Oh I also called in today to cancel my identiy-monitor membership, only to be talked out of it by the operator. Boy, he was slick. So I called back after I checked some information out, only to get a incoherent operator who just did not respond to my several "hello? hellos?" even though I could hear noise in the background. And then I think another woman took over, mumbled an entire paragraph into the phone which I couldn't understand, due to her mouth being too close to the phone or her not articulating certain words correctly, or SOMETHING! In any case...I think I succeeded. I think.

That's all for today.

Hello everyone! I'd like you all to welcome Tess to the blogging circle. She's my first fashion/crafts/cool stuff blog. I'm so excited! I'm awaiting all the cool stuff that she wants that she'll introduce to us in the future. Huzzah! Find her link on your left.

Currently: debating whether to call in sick tomorrow. Body aches, head hurts, warm face, and I'm constantly craving ice cream. Yup, I'm sick.

And you see, its not like I don't like christmas. In fact, I have the charlie brown christmas album, and the chipmunks christmas album! (well, more like on tape) It's just that I'd rather people give each holiday their due time and space, and not rush into things. But it's too late.

I've been pondering whether or not to start posting pictures up on my blog. Would be nice to see some pictures, like my martha stewart flowers i made for the shower. And my polka dot dress wore to said shower. Or the twice worn red hooker heels I have that are oh so uncomfortable but look oh sooo chic. Or the new BLACK** music stand with new magical books. But it's such a hassle to load them from the camera and post. Oh what to do. Be less lazy I guess, and more proactive? Nah.

**Forgot to blog about the new music stand that only vonne may appreciate. So i got a new music stand. And it is black. And I am crazy about it. Y'see, ever since I was a kid, all I had were those silver cheapo looking music stands. They like to shout obscenities like "student!" or "beginner!" or "lame-o" at me when I look their way. But no more! I recently haven't been able to find my old silver stand. (hmm...gee...too bad.) So i got a new one. My new music stand is still the cheapo kind, but now in BLACK! Now it whispers "sexy" and "oh mama" when I give it the come hither look. And then I drive it crazy by making it hold my new sexy books of Positions on it. Boy, wait til I get to those 9th positions. My stand will just self collapse and fall to the floor. I can't wait. It's going to be grand.

Maybe that'll be the first picture I post? ;-)

Yesterday I heard my first christmas song in a store. I COULDN'T BELIEVE IT! Let us have thankgiving people!! I was so mad I almost grabbed the store clerk next to me by the collar to ask "Why? WHY??? Why now, on November 3rd?" But I didn't want to get kicked out. But really, I almost turned to her and said, "Seriously? SERIOUSLY??" Then i realized, she probably has no control over what the store plays. It's not her fault. Besides, this song wasn't one of those blantantly obvious christmas songs. It was one of those peripherals ones, only slightly alluding to the holiday. So i took a deep breath, and let it go. Could've been a fluke. After that a hip hop song played. That's more like it, I thought. Even though I hate this song, its still better than christmas in november. I silently apologized to the store clerk in my head, for what I almost would've done. So i continued my shopping, having forgotten about the whole debacle, when BAM! On comes another christmas song. This time, one of those BLATANTLY OBVIOUS ones. Ooooh, they are sneaky like that, trying to hide amongst the hip hop and top 40. Who the hell do these christmas songs think they are?!??!?!

Ok. Deep breath.

So i recently watched Swingers. I know, I know, i'm like a decade too late on the swinger craze. In my defense, I tried to watch it when it first came out on video, but after 20min, me and the bf at the time had to turn it off. We were just so bored. Plus we were naive kids in OC, unaware to the culture on the other side of the curtain. But now, living in LA, especially in the city, and after everyone always making references to it, I decided to pick it up again and give it a second shot. Not too bad i'd have to say. A little too much talky talky but it had some good moments, and good lines. I would've loved to have known Los Feliz before it was invaded by hipsters though. That would've been nice. Oh well, c'est la vie.

Oh, and only in LA would you see 2 guys underneath a junkie, messy, but colorful freeway overpass on an early saturday morning. One smiling dashingly while the other took pictures of that dashing smile with a very expensive looking camera. I'm not hip with it, but didn't someone tell me that headshots are obsolete now because they never look like the real person (it's true, they never do)? But then again, i guess they'll never die out, people will always like to look pretty on paper and have hundreds of copies of them. I know i do.

And only in LA do you hear conversations about "that show getting picked up" at starbucks.

The P's and GP's are here, gotta run!

In the background: It's the great pumpkin Charlie Brown! I love charlie brown. I can totally relate.

Last night at the grocery store: stuffing for turkey.
Tonight at Target: Christmas and Hanukkah on the shelves.

What is wrong with these people? Can't we just have each holiday in peace? Without all the other holidays creeping in, trying to take over? Good grief Charlie Brown.

Today I learned that the Intern might go to the playboy mansion tomorrow, but she might not, she's already been there twice. Zut! The closest i'll ever come to the playboy mansion is to watch Weezer's Beverly Hills video.

Crap. Just saw a commerical for Shrek the Halls. Shrek and Christmas. Geez louise my knees and honeybees. Let the craziness begin.

So the wedding is finally over. Whew. What a whirlwind. Have yet to see pictures, didn't have time to get my hair done. What was suppose to be a great "do" turned out to be just a pony tail. Phooey.

Haha. Charlie Brown just got a rock.

Ok, too many things going on. Must go download some pictures now. Be back later with more coherent intelligence.

OH! How i love the sweet smell of a violin shoppe. I'm not quite sure what the smell is, probably wood polisher...but ahhhhh, it is so sweet. Or maybe i'm just getting high off the toxic fumes, who knows. This morning I took a field trip to metzler to hunt down these books someone in orchestra had recommended. I have this fantasy that once I master these two books, I will be THE GREATEST VIOLIN PLAYER EVERRRRR!!! And I mean, EVERRRRR!!!! OF ALL TIMEEE!

Volume 1, third and fifth positions. I should have these down by now but, what do you know, I don't! Volume 2, second fourth sixth and seventh positions. Seven? I didn't even know positions go up that high. It's all squeaky eek eek eeks after fifth for me. Ha. But I realized the reason I'm always so timid with my playing is that I don't really know my positions. I half learned them way back when, never really mastered them. So now's my chance. Wait for my comeback people! It's gonna be great! Ah...new books.

And yes, i realize all this probably means nothing for most of you, except maybe vonne and christine. And....they're both currently in nyc. Hope you're having fun vonnie!

I'm off to sniff some polisher...

Holy Crap!

2.5 months later am I only realizing that I've forgotten about my own anniversary. My own 6 year anniversary! I can't believe it. The thought didn't even come up. Not even close. I'm sorry blog. I've been doing shitty things like this to you lately. I know I've apologized before. But happy belated birthday anyways. At least we celebrated your 500th post with cake and ice cream.

What? We didn't?!?

Well. Well I'll just have to go make that up to you right now!

I am in love with aphorisms! And more specifically, chiasmus. This is a wonderful exciting discovery which i hope to share more of in the future. It's so fitting for a blog, too. Perhaps one day, I'll be able to communicate solely through aphorisms, like how people communicate with their hands. I'll be spitting them out one after another. That would be awesome. For now, I am just a young grasshopper, learning the ways of aphorisms.

Wow, my 500th post. If this was a TV show, you'd be watching the cast cutting an enormous cake while the credits rolled right now. I've always wondered if there was enough cake for the audience to have a piece too. But the credits never rolled long enough for me to find out.

So this is not a TV show. It is just my blog. Read by an audience of less than 10, but more like 4. So thanks for being here. If i had cake, there would be enough for y'all.

There's so much I want to write about tonight, to get out of my system. But it's really hard for me to expose myself on a blog such as this. Also the reason why this is not a TV show. Though, some of the things that go on in my head makes for good TV. At least I think so. And you've been privy to it. Just read the archives.

Instead, I'll write about something I just thought of at this moment. Something I'm slapping my hand to my forehead for doing. Or rather, not doing. My friend steven moved away today. We've been trying to get together before he left, but it just didn't happen. I told myself to call him today, and the day happened and I totally forgot. And now he's gone. He's such a great guy and we've just kinda lost touch in the past year or so, but there were always the occasional emails or calls. We shared a love for pie and the bookstore. He had an infectious smile and bought shirts he never wore. He was one of the first friends I made when I came out here. Steven, I know you don't read this, but I'm sorry I'm such a bonehead. I'll miss you.

This month in my Working Mother magazine:

Get over your guilt: Why it's time to let go.

as well as

Catch it early: Is your daughter anorexic?


Egads. It's tough being a working mom.

It's beginning to get cold. Yesterday was the first day of fall, and what a beautiful day it was (or so it seemed from our 16th story windows). I love this time of year. I'm getting ready for my heavy blanket, warm sweaters, and hot soupy ramen noodles. (Ok, who am i kidding, i eat that stuff year round. But it tastes better when its cold.)

Speaking of marshmallows: Mallomars. H introduced me to them at the C a few years ago, when she came back from her trip to NY. Back then, I ate in wonder at this cookie that was so befitting of me. So I took another. And another. I've recently forgotten about them until about a week ago. And suddenly I'm having this craving. I don't know why they only sell these on the east coast. Maybe the warmer weather here makes for unsatisfactory marshmallow conditions? But still. There's ways around it. I know you can get them online, but I need a local store where I can just walk in any day and get my fix. I told H about my craving, and that it was her fault because she introduced them to me, like some sort of drug pusher doing business. She laughed and said her mom will send some. Oh happiness. I cannot wait. Next time I go to the east coast, I will leave as myself, but return as a mule...A MULE OF MALLOMARS. muahahaha.

Now the thing I'm not sure about is whether they're all over the east coast, or just in NYC, where H got them, or maybe in select states of the west coast as well? Would they be available in Dallas? Chicago? Seattle? Miami? Beuller? Beuller? I need to do some more research, but your help is kindly appreciated.

Anyone know where I can find a mini skulls and bones patch?

I have a hole in my shoes. My very simple, black canvas flats that I got from target 2 years ago. The left shoe has a hole right where my pinky toe is, so very often, my pinky likes to peep out for some sun. I really like these simple shoes and I don't think its quite their time to go yet. But at the same time, everyone also likes to point out that i have a hole in my shoe, plus its probably not work appropriate now with the hole. Many have already told me, "Those are very basic shoes, I bet you can find them anywhere." Wrong people, wrong! I cannot find them anywhere. They were so last last season.

Which is why I think a mini patch would do just the trick. But it can't be any patch. It has to be the right patch. It has to be skull and bones.

I was just at the grocery store, where this lady approached me out of nowhere, and asked me if I would like to get my fortune read, as she had picked up good energy from me. Now, she wasn't just soliciting everyone, she was actually grocery shopping with what seemed like her mother, and while she waited for her mother, I happened to walk by her, and that's when she asked me. I said no thank you, though as i walked away i wondered if she really did pick up good energy, or if it was just some pickup line she uses on all her potential clients? And, if i didn't possess this so called "good energy," would she still have wanted to read my fortune? Who knows.

Lately, I've been wondering about the outside life. As in, life outside the entertainment industry. I'm always curious as to how people outside of this industry spend their weekends, or in their spare time. Aside from the regular 9-5 job, it seems like everyone in LA always has some project they're working on. Whether its their latest script, that short film to edit, preparation for the next short, acting class, band practice, orchestra rehearsal, singing lessons, dance class....on and on and on. Like today, I drove by these three kids (ok, not kids, they're like my age) on the sidewalk, with a very fancy camera in hand, probably shooting some comedy. They're working on a sunday, like most of us do. So, let's say I was a dentist in Kentucky. Imagine all the free time I'd have on the weekends!

No no, I take that back, I guess its not true. I guess it's not just us here in this industry, everyone has some sort of side project they're perpetually working on. Takes away from the lull of the work week, I guess. I don't know what I was thinking.

I guess I was just thinking about how nice it would be to lounge around on the weekends and do whatever I want. And yes, I'm free to do that. In fact, from time to time, i DO do that. But how nice would it be to be able to do that without having this constant nagging feeling in the back of my head telling me: what are you doing lounging about when you have x, y, z to do??? But that probably goes for everyone, eh?

I'm giving myself 15 min. of blog time before i set off to engulf myself in a few hours of work.

I don't know what it is with me and cravings. When I crave something, I must have it right away. I crave lemon bars, so I make them. I had the sudden urge to watch this movie I loaned to a friend, so I had him bring it back. I had a craving for pho, so I had pho. If i have an idea for an art project, I must start it right away, even though its 10pm and all the supply stores are closed. I guess I just need instant gratification?

This morning, I got out of my car and saw a couple walking towards me, holding hands. I suddenly had an urge to have my hand held. Whenever I read people write about this or that "wave" of something "washing over them," I always think, yes yes yes, blah blah blah you crazy writer, just get to the point. Ok, now I get the point. I apologize to all crazy writers with waves. This morning when I saw the couple, I felt the "wave" of something "wash over me." It was a longing to have my hand held, nothing more, nothing less. I could've just walked up to them, and put my hand into his, or hers. But then that would've been weird, right?

Currently: sudden case of the sniffles.

Just had to get up and get a tissue after that sentence. Hopefully these sniffles are just on holiday in my nose, and will be on their merry way again soon. Hopefully by tomorrow. By the time i wake up. You hear that sniffles!!

The apartment is in a state of shambles from a week of neglect, and a prior week's full of stuff in preparation for a shower. Stuff will hopefully be returned to their proper origins this weekend.

I received a phone book in front of my door two days ago. Came at a weird time since C had just recently asked, "Who uses phone books anymore when there's the internet?" To which I replied, "Lots of people! Especially for businesses, like when you're at the dentist and you want a pizza..." Shortly thereafter, I realized that perhaps not many people have the sudden urge to order pizza when they're at the dentist. They're most likely to do so when they get home.

So fast forward a week, and I get this phone book on my door step. One with the same information I can get on google. One that, along with its brothers and sisters, could have saved an entire forest of trees. So I'm left with a dilemma. Trash the freshly printed, unopened, still-in-plastic-bag (again! useless packaging!), already-killed-a-tree book that I'm never going to use again? Or keep it around so at least this already made useless thing of a book can feel like it had some sort of purpose? Perhaps I'll have small guests over someday that will need to sit on one. Perhaps my world will befall on some disaster where the only way to keep warm will be to burn things. Or my internet will be down one day and I'll really need to order pizza. Actually, no, I never order pizza. Sigh, what to do?

After throwing this bridal shower, I've come to the realization that I may turn out to be one of those evil brides if I ever plan my own wedding. I was easily agitated, tired from running to this store and that store, and stressed out all week. The pimples on my face are still around, laughing in my face...that is, MY face, that surface which they are currently so attached to, and have been all week. Thus, no wedding. Simple!

Over the weekend I had my first encounter of: "When's it your turn?" Ugh. I wanted to punch him. But it came from my older cousin. So I wouldn't have gotten away with it. Had to do the polite, haha-laugh-it-off bit. I feel as though that will get old real soon. Reeeeeal soon. As in, it's already old. Puh-lease. Just save me from kicking you in the face, and don't ask me such questions.

Oh orchestra...how I love thee. Let me count the ways....

1. no outwardly annoying types yet.
2. awesome music, challenging, yet playable.
3. i love my violin
4. all that counting and paying attention really works my brain. in a good way. and you know how hard it is to work my brain...

*Correction on previous post: I'm 26, not 25. Shit. I'm already slipping.

I'm not a competitor by any means. But when it comes to certain things, especially things that don't really matter, I find myself competing even when my competitors aren't the least aware that we're competition. I guess in this way (this way as in, the they-don't-know-we're-in-competition way), I've got a leg up! Today I found myself thinking about this girl I went to HS with, thinking about everything she accomplished in school, and gee golly, look at her now. I started comparing all the things that shes done, and all the things that i've done, even though- we don't talk to each other. I have no idea what goes on in her life. And vice versa. And I find myself competing and comparing secretly with people all the time. "She has nicer hair, but at least I have bangs. Ha! Take that, girl on the street I'll never meet!" And so on.

What is that all about?

I just need to chill out and remember that my life is pretty darn good. I always forget that. Why is that so easily forgotten? Especially in this world of drunk driving, jail, rehab, and bombed comebacks (sorry, just had to add that), the life I have is pretty darn good. In my 25 years I haven't been to jail yet (though, knock on wood and wait til i get this unending traffic violation resolved...), the only drug i'm currently doped up on is Nyquil (knocks you out, wake up refreshed!), and and...wait for it wait for it......

And i've got my bangs.

So...really. Life is good.

Anyway, this wasn't meant to be a preachy blog. I just found my mind drifting about this person or that person and comparing myself to them that I needed to take this time and reassure and remind myself of my awesome-ness.

Therefore, dear reader. Please please please take this moment to think of three reasons why you're awesome as well. Put it in my comments so everyone else can see, because everyone should. I promise I won't compare my awesomeness to yours.



Really, you're just cheating yourself and the world if you don't do this. Besides, nobody reads this blog except for you anyways. ;-)

Conversation recently heard though my open window:

Guy 1: ...that girl? She's a married woman!
Guy 2: Dood! Did you ask her out?
Guy 1: Yea!


Didn't get to hear the rest of the conversation. The things I hear with the window open. People also like to sing as they walk by my window. Sometimes they're good. Mostly they're not.

Thank goodness for nyquil.

Currently: Pondering going out for ice cream, but that would mean getting dressed. Been holed up in the apt all day, scantily clad, joined by a broken AC and one small fan. Nonetheless, I still got alot accomplished. Of course, not as much as I wanted, but still has been a productive day. Debating whether to take another shower before bed. In the background: bad weight loss reality TV, not even the good one. Can't stand it, so lame, will turn off. Almost forgot, popsicles in fridge. On top of beer. Beer: cold. Me: hot. Apt: oven. Can't complete full sentences...

Yes. Yes I can.

I could go be more productive and hot, or I could just go sit in front of the fan, subject myself to more bad summer tv. Oh boy, the choices.

Bangs have been put away under these circumstances. They could never hack such weather. Ha. Sorry, anonymous, for there will be no pictures of them tonight! I hope you cry yourself to sleep!

Gotta go, beer and popsicle are waiting for me to kill them off. It's gonna be grand.

Bangs.

That's been the topic of conversation this week. I got some bangs last weekend. I don't know that I've ever gotten so many compliments on something before. Who knew? Who knew that if i revert back to my look from freshman year (thats highschool, not college), that I'd get so much positive feed back? In fact, so much that I'm a little bit jealous of the bangs. It's just hair, big deal, why do THEY get so much attention? What about me?? ME ME ME! No one cares about lil' old SH now that new bangs are in town.

SH made dinner!
Who cares, let's look at her bangs.

SH had to stay at work late.
But how are the bangs holding up to the stress?

SH banged (no pun intended) her head on the low tree branch.
Are the bangs OK??

SH is down on the ground crying in pain.
Stop writhing so much SH, we can't see the bangs.


Sigh.
"With great bangs come great responsibility. It is only to be used for Good, and big foreheads. Nothing else." - a wise dood


That's it for this post. Next post, I will attempt sarcasm.

So the other day i was in the grove parking lot, circling around, trying to find parking. I finally followed a lady who was going to her car, only to turn the corner, and see that another car was waiting in the vicinity.

Now what are the rules on parking spots? Do I get it because I followed her? Or do they get it because they're waiting right next to where she parked?

In any case, had it been a family of 3 or more, or even a cute looking couple, I would've just let them have it without giving it a second thought (even though i'd been circling around and around for a while). Instead....it was a white top down bmw. With two girls in it. Two 18-ish rich snobby girls who were dressed like they looked snobby. And while the lady pulled out, it was me vs. them. And they won. They took the spot. Partly because I'm a pushover, and partly because there's two of their snobby little asses, and I was only one. And yes, even in their short shorts and long hair, the two of them could've kicked my ass. Ugh. I hate these situations. i know this is prejudiced, but i hate when priviliged people get what they want. It's like they won. And I hate it when they win.

I wish i could've pulled a Kathy Bates ala Fried Green Tomatoes. In fact, while we waited for the lady to pull out, during the minutes when there was a staring show down between me and the girls, I thought about pulling the Kathy Bates. But...again, two of them, one of me. And I'm not as old as Kathy Bates was in the movie, I don't know that I'm more insured than the girls.

Ugh, things like this piss me off. Especially when I pass by the same girls in my cirlcle around the parking lot for the Xth time, who now have gotten out of their BMW and is now putting their designer sunglasses on and tossing their gucci bags over their shoulders.

What is a girl to do? Nothing. Keep looking for the next empty spot.

Just finished up adding some ram to my computer. I feel like such a cool nerd. Hooray for ram!!

Word of the night: Offen Bach. Not sometimes Bach. But Offen Bach. hahahahahahha. awesome.

So, final word on HSM. You should definitely see it......................IF you are between the ages of 5 and 12! If you don't fall between that...or within a year or two, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT touch it with a ten foot pole. And this is coming from someone who often acts as though she is between the ages of 5 and 12 (but...more like a mature 13). I'll let the teeny bops have Zack Efron. I've got bigger fish to fry.

Mmm...fish........fried.........

Whoa whoa.

Why didn't anyone inform me?? Apparently, I'm a working mom. Today I received the Aug/Sept issue of Working Mothers. It wasn't even a mistake, it had my full name and address printed on it and everything. Geez, time flies. Suddenly I'm getting married, having kids, and working on m career all at the same time, without knowing it. I wonder if my kids resent me for working a full time job? I know my dead plants do. Muahahaha.

Haven't had time to flip through it yet, but it IS the back to school issue. That's huge for moms, isn't it?

I wonder if they have any "easy packed lunch" ideas in this issue. I always try to steal those from Good Morning America segments, or random articles on the net around this time of year, and apply them when making my own grown up lunch. Except...these easy lunch ideas always involve some sort of carrot sticks or string cheese combo...both of which I hate. Why can't they ever be: Insert Ho-Ho, snack-sized Flaming Hot Cheetos, V-8 Splash with mini vodka bottle into lunch bag, shake well, serves 1? Easy peasy, ready in 2 minutes.

dammit...suppose to be in bed 1/2 hour ago and i'm still here!! so much for the pep talk...now i'm listening to the rest of the album...AGAIN!

I can't stop listening to sia. I'm in love with her music. I've been meaning to wean off these two albums and move on to something new but I just can't part with such sweetness.

Tonight I'm going to bed early. Currently listening to sia's "I Go To Sleep" for inspiration, and as a pre-bed pep talk. Tired. Tired. But so many potentially exciting projects in queue! I want to start immediately. But I must go to sleep. Better to start fresh. Ugh, but its hot. Speaking of queue, High School Musical is off of mine, as an email told me it has shipped, and will be here tomorrow. Oh, the anticipation. I will need some privacy this weekend (if not sooner) to be alone with this disc. If you don't hear from me, I'm probably unavoidably entertained by said disc. Check in to find out!

I don't know what it is, but I do not want to go to bed! I'm tired and sleepy...but the idea of bed right now seems so anticlimatic to yet another anticlimatic day. Maybe its the august heat. I'm parched as a fish. But I guess fish don't get thirsty. I'm parched as a piece of parchment. The kind that makes the scratchy noises when you write on it with a feather ink pen. Kinda antsy too. Already thinking about my cup of coffee tomorrow morning. Geez, that's such an addict thing to do.

Yesterday I saw ugly betty at whole foods in the fruit section. I should've taken a picture of her and sent it off to US WEEKLY with the headlines "Celebrities: They eat fruit like the rest of us!" I was eyeing her from the mangoes when I realized, I don't even want to buy mangoes. So I moved over to the nectarines and she walked by me there too! So I started to fruit stalk her. Then I realized, this is silly, I stopped watching the show mid season, I need to stop stalking mid fruit section. As I moved along, I noticed that blonde beach boy 2 of blond beach boy 1 and 2 was doing the same thing I was. He was in no way interested in those lemons. He was just using them to get a good look at her. Just another day in the 'Woods.

Maybe before the summer's over, I'll pull one of those all nighters, where I get to hear the birds chirp and see the sun come up. For now its bed time.

OMG! Why didn't anyone tell me????


The best show I have NOT been watching all summer: So You Think You Can Dance. I caught the finale tonight, and realized that I've missed a great great show. And I thought nothing was on during the summer. Oh sadness, oh woe. But goooo Sabre! (Except that fanning yourself when you cried thing...perhaps you need to work on a new "Oh my god I can't believe I won" reaction.")

And to top it off, I've just added High School Musical to my queue. What has the world come to? But I must find out the intrigue that is behind this so-called Zack Efron. I MUST! Will report back later.

Does anyone listen to Martini Shot?? Man there was a great one tonight, his stories are the stuff great blogs are made of! I only wish I have my own 5 minutes on the radio. The things I would rant about!

Like online dress shopping. Normally I wouldn't do it. But in this situation, I had to. And of course, it doesn't fit quite right. But i guess at least it fits, maybe I can get it tailored.

I would rant about (oh, there goes the neighbor upstairs...tromp tromp tromp...and his little dog too...humph)...well, I guess I would rant about neighbors! But i've already done that.

I'd rant about how orchestra people are usually annoying. We are, we really are. Maybe its because we were all nerds in school. Maybe we're so super intelligent that we don't know how to talk to the common man and have to belittle everyone else because we went to schools like Juliard. Woooo...Juliard. We know everyone else doesn't really care where we went to school, but I guess when we pay so much for it you have to name drop once in a while. (Ok, that's uncalled for, I know. But i am on a roll.) For some reason we ALL feel the need to blurt out stuff to the conductor. "Where where where?" Maybe if we just shut up and paid attention we would've heard what he said the first time. We think our non-sensical jokes are funny when they're not. We feel the need to keep playing and hold everyone else up when the conductor has obviously stopped. And, last but not least, we always feel the need to rush. Fast fast and faster. Those are speeds which we operate on. Go us.

Been doing some wedding type stuff recently. About ready to send out about 30 invites for a bridal shower. This whole process is quite interesting. I WANT to get into it. All the frills and pink and princess ways of thinking and whatnot. Not that it has become a chore because its not and because I've chosen this position, but I just can't seem to get excited about it and get REALLY into it. It's become a task. A task that I will do a kickass job in, but nothing like the thrill of working with a pen and paper, or molding some clay, or heck even editing! I guess it is mine to do what I choose to do, so I should change my attitude, and make it fun and exciting in my own way. But really...the idea of sitting with 30 other women coo-ing over stuff is just well...I'll leave it at that. And what about decorations? I didn't decorate my 2 yr apt, and its taken me months to finish my current bedroom. I don't decorate. I can organize and stack and make things nice and neat, but....to decorate a whole party? oy vey. Off now to lick some envelopes.